Is is selfish of me to want to have a baby and not be married?

Ok, I've been with my boyfriend for about 2 years now and we've been living together for about a year now. He's 27 and I'm 25. We're not married or engaged or anything like that, but here's the thing. I want to have kids. I know he's said he wants to too, but ';when the time is right';. When is the time right? I don't understand that. How can I go about talking to him about it without looking like a crazy chick?Is is selfish of me to want to have a baby and not be married?
We dont live in the 1900's ne more its perfectly acceptable to have children out of wedlock and more than half the babies born today are not born into married couples, providing that you and your partner love each other then i dont see why not, and as for the perfect time thing i really dont think there is a perfect time.. unless u r extreemly rich etc etc... as long as u can give a baby a good home and lots of love then any time is good... tell him how you really feel about it, if he respects u and loves u he will sit and listen to your points of view..





Good luckIs is selfish of me to want to have a baby and not be married?
Its not necessarily selfish but its better to make sure that you both are wanting to have the child. If you want a child but he is not ready for one that could hurt you and your babies relationship with the father. Money could also be a big thing right now. Having a baby is expensive. So in my opinion I think you should talk to him about how you feel and explain to him you want a child before your thirty and why you want to have a child with him. Make him realize how much you see him in your future.
Women tend to have a biological clock in us that urges us to have kids every now and then (especially when we start to inch towards 40). But that's not the same with guys mainly bc they can stay pretty fertile till they can't ';get it up'; anymore. So it is not wrong for you to have a desire to have a child just bc you are not married. Getting married does not automatically make people good parents. The important question is ';are you ready to provide financially and emotionally for your child';? and will you be capable doing this by yourself if it came to that? If you think you can then you have all the right to propose your idea to your bf. Just tell him honestly and openly. It's important and healthy for your relationship to be able to discuss issues like these. And if you want to know when ';the time is right'; just ask him and make him think about the answer to that question. The answer should have some reachable goal or time frame.
The time to have children is when you are in a committed marriage. Its not selfish to want children but do it the right way. Also if your boyfriend keeps putting marriage off i would reconsider your relationship. Nothing is harder than being in a relationship with someone who doesn't want the same thing as you You will always have conflict. It is possible for him to change though. When my hubby and I were first married he wanted to wait to have children for 2 or 3 years and that was hard for me cause I was 24 when we got married and I was ready to have children. Our mistake was we didn't discuss that before we were married. After a year he changed his mind though.
he might want kids after you guys are married, or even engaged.


it's best to wait until then.


enjoy your time together alone right now, and get a pet. it's very understandable that you would want kids, since you're already 25, but no need to rush it. the time will come, as he said. he probably isn't ready just yet. and you have to make sure hell be a good father too.