I think my daughter is too young to get married?

My daughter has been dating a very nice young man ever since she was 14 years old. Her boyfriend came over and asked me if he could marry her I told him I would have to think about it as far as I know he hasn鈥檛 asked my daughter yet. I really like the guy but I think they are both too young to get married he is 21 my daughter is 17. I am not against them being together or getting married in a few years. I don鈥檛 know what to do? Or what to tell him?I think my daughter is too young to get married?
So, instead of answering your question, I'm going to tell you a story that I think is hilarious... because it's true.





A pair of very religious families had children. Two of the children (one from each family!) fell in love in their very young teens (13 and 14). They pledged their love to each other and promised to wait until marriage to explore sex. They were inseparable for years.





When they were 17 and 18, they said to their parents, 'we aren't waiting any more, we've loved each other for years, and we want to get married.'





Their parents freaked out. 'You're too young!' Et cetera.





The children went away and formed a plot to get what they wanted. You see, they weren't wanting to get married so they could have sex, they wanted to get married so they would be married.





So, they had sex. Several times over the course of 2 months. She got pregnant. They took the test results to their parents and said, 'now will you let us get married?'





When you seek to prevent one thing, often you provoke something else that you really don't want.





What is it that you want?





What do you want for your child? Family? Community?I think my daughter is too young to get married?
Here is my opinion on the situation Sit him down and have a talk tell him that you don't oppose to the two of them getting married but you wish that it is to be a long engagement at least till she is 18..then they are free to do as they please...the fact that he asked shows that he is a respectable young man.I don't see a problem with both their ages as I am 19 and engaged to a 30yr. old man and we are trying to have kids.All I can say is just talk with him if he is as good as you say he is then there should be no problem and he should be willing to wait!
Sounds like a good guy just tell him what you honestly think. The pro's the con's and everything in between.
I think you should tell him what you just said...you not aganist them being together but would like for them to wait a few more years before marriage. Just tell him you just want her to only have to worry about college and getting out on her own for a little while before she becomes a wife, so you think it would be good if they could at least let her get a year or two of college done first.
Well I wouldn't make your opinion too well known otherwise you and her will end up enemies. I am 19 and I hope to marry my boyfriend really soon.
I let my 16 yr old get engaged ..but its a good plan she has


Her sweety is in the Navy for the next 4 yrs. She will stay home go to college ..and then they both have something to offer to the marriage.
Deffinetly too young! Tell him they can get engaged when she turns 20. Make her finish High School!!!
Well I think that you should let them get married.





As other people has said, stopping them from marrying may lead to them doing...other things.





Besides, it's less than a year until she's 18 and they will get married then, so you might as well just let them do it now.





If it ends badly, it will be their fault, not yours.
Yuck..you let your 14 y/o date an 18 y/o?


I'm sure all the answers are to be found with a bunch of strangers on YA.
Tell him he has your blessing, as long as they wait ';said'; amount of time. There's nothing wrong with a long engagement...
I think that once they are 18, and living on their own they can do what they wish, but while she is still being supported by her parents, she can't be his wife. Simple enough. Part of being a wife is no longer people under the responsibility of your parents.
well im 21 now and when i was 16 i got married to a guy i thought i loved and had a baby with him. well we got divorced 3 months later cause he totally changed from a perfect guy to a posessive, over protected a**hole! i would just tell her that you think she should wait not because you dont like him but because you want her to be sure that she can handle with what comes with getting married and tell him that you think that it would be a good idea if he waited at least untill shes 18..or older but at 18 she will do whatever she wants..trust me i did...hope this helps
yes your daughter really is too young in my opinion
I would say since you like the guy, yes they can get married but you must have a longer engagement. They are young and have no clue what lies ahead but they do know that they love each other. Which is the most important part. Is she even out of high school yet? Also bring up what they would do to support themselves I mean maybe the boy has a good job, but she is just out of high school and also what about college (if she is going)


When my husband and I got married our pastor had us get this book (each got one) its kind of a great workbook that really helps you understand each other and the difficult tasks that are ahead. Because even though we love each other doesn't mean there won't be a bumpy patch down the road. A lot changes when you no longer live with mom and dad and have to survive on your own. The book is called Strengthening Your Marriage by Wayne A. Mack....Originally I think it is geared toward married couples but is perfect for before getting married and We like to look at it around our anniversary or if we need to get on the ';same page'; shall I say. Its great for communication! I found it on amazon.com


Best of Luck to you and your new son-in-law.
I know every relationship is different but let me tell you a little story.





My sister met this guy when she was around 13 or 14. He's a few years older than her probably about 3 or so. They have been dating for about 3 years and when my sister was 17 my mom let her get married. They've been married since April 2009 and are now talking about getting divorced as he feels he ';isn't ready'; to be married and would rather go out and party all the time instead of stay at home with his wife.





It costs money to get divorced and divorce rate is pretty high. Sure, they have a chance of making it, but it takes time and effort to make it work. Make sure your daughter realizes that.
I would tell him to wait until she is 18 then he can marry her.And make them go to pre marital counseling.
I am not by any means opposed to getting married young but if he is 21 and she is 17 the ages are a little too far apart. If she was 25 and he was 29 that would be one thing but that is to much of an age difference for a young couple. She will have to ultimately make the decision and just hope to God you raised her to be a strong women as my mother did. I got married at 18 and my husband was 19. My father never would have let me marry him if he didn't believe with all his heart he would take care of us. My mother was heartbroken because she thought she had failed but in reality I never would have had the strength to go through with it if it were not for my parents. I wrote that in a mother's day card and it made her cry. Just believe that your daughter will do what is in her heart. You will never lose her. I promise. It will make you closer. Good luck!
Well I would tell them (him) you would rather they wait but if they go ahead with it you give them your blessing and wish the best for them. Yes she is definitely too young and will probably end up divorced BUT people have to make their own mistakes. Don't ruin your relationship with your daughter over this, it won't help!