I love the show by the way. But I wonder, has it ever had a serious moment? From what I've seen, it's just jokes/humor and never like a heartfelt moment or something like that.Did Married With Children ever have a serious moment?
It was a good show! But from what i remember i don't think it had serious moments. Just all laughs.Did Married With Children ever have a serious moment?
probably not
let's put it this way, the Simpsons is less of a cartoon
probably not, i love it.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Why are people getting married so soon?
I see alot of people getting married at the ages of 17, 18, 19. And I mean sure they probably love their significant other enough to marry them but why so soon? Why is everybody in such a rush these days?Why are people getting married so soon?
yeah I know
and they always end up in divorcesWhy are people getting married so soon?
My mom told me that when I turned 18, I was on my own. No car, no college, no money - nothing.
So I asked my boyfriend of two years if he would marry me, because I didn't know what else to do! He said yes, and now, 30 years and two kids (and now 1 grandson!) later, we are still deeply in love and will be married until the end.
maybe some people are starting to realize that going through life with a committed, caring, loving and equal partner who will be your best and closest friend for life is a lot better than f-----g most of your life away... and want to get as much of that joy in their lives as they can.
Because they are bored and have nothing better to do with their time. They get out of high school and suddenly, they aren't surrounded by drama anymore. So they need something else to make their life resemble a soap opera. What better? A long series of marriages and messy divorces! Yay!
I'm a sophomore (19) at a Christian college and here it's weird NOT to be engaged... peer pressure? I know I get antsy sometimes. My room mate got engaged this year and my boyfriend and I have been dating the same amount of time they have been, and we aren't engaged.
I think they simply want to have their own lives.
But I think it's still best to wait until you are in your mid or late twenties to get married, that way you'll not be only mentally stable but as well as financially.
^__^
everybody probably starts seeing more and more love around them, and feels insecure and fells they need to get married, plus hormones
teehee
Never!
They only get married cause wedding dances are a good party.
ive noticed that too...and no idea why they would be getting married so fast.
it could be that people have been ingrained to save sex for marriage and they are horny so marriage = fun times....i guess..
A century or less ago people aged 19 were already married and had 2 or 3 kids. Must be some sort of ';retro'; thing going on.
The Mayans believe the world will end in 2012. Better get hitched before it's too late. O_o
Some people must just learn the hard way
because the girls are pregnant, that's why
It's all the super devil's fault. Curse him and his jar of marmalade.
They have a fantasy about what love is and what it will be.
cuz the world's ending in 2012
they want sex
I don't understand it either. I'm 24 and I still don't want to be married yet. I'm enjoying my freedom.
yeah I know
and they always end up in divorcesWhy are people getting married so soon?
My mom told me that when I turned 18, I was on my own. No car, no college, no money - nothing.
So I asked my boyfriend of two years if he would marry me, because I didn't know what else to do! He said yes, and now, 30 years and two kids (and now 1 grandson!) later, we are still deeply in love and will be married until the end.
maybe some people are starting to realize that going through life with a committed, caring, loving and equal partner who will be your best and closest friend for life is a lot better than f-----g most of your life away... and want to get as much of that joy in their lives as they can.
Because they are bored and have nothing better to do with their time. They get out of high school and suddenly, they aren't surrounded by drama anymore. So they need something else to make their life resemble a soap opera. What better? A long series of marriages and messy divorces! Yay!
I'm a sophomore (19) at a Christian college and here it's weird NOT to be engaged... peer pressure? I know I get antsy sometimes. My room mate got engaged this year and my boyfriend and I have been dating the same amount of time they have been, and we aren't engaged.
I think they simply want to have their own lives.
But I think it's still best to wait until you are in your mid or late twenties to get married, that way you'll not be only mentally stable but as well as financially.
^__^
everybody probably starts seeing more and more love around them, and feels insecure and fells they need to get married, plus hormones
teehee
Never!
They only get married cause wedding dances are a good party.
ive noticed that too...and no idea why they would be getting married so fast.
it could be that people have been ingrained to save sex for marriage and they are horny so marriage = fun times....i guess..
A century or less ago people aged 19 were already married and had 2 or 3 kids. Must be some sort of ';retro'; thing going on.
The Mayans believe the world will end in 2012. Better get hitched before it's too late. O_o
Some people must just learn the hard way
because the girls are pregnant, that's why
It's all the super devil's fault. Curse him and his jar of marmalade.
They have a fantasy about what love is and what it will be.
cuz the world's ending in 2012
they want sex
I don't understand it either. I'm 24 and I still don't want to be married yet. I'm enjoying my freedom.
Could you handle being married to a rock star?
With all the consent touring and them being gone all the time?Could you handle being married to a rock star?
no, the question is
could she handle being married to me
*blink blink*Could you handle being married to a rock star?
err...maybe.......probly not tho
no, the question is
could she handle being married to me
*blink blink*Could you handle being married to a rock star?
err...maybe.......probly not tho
Are you single, never married and dating someone who is recently divorced?
What sort of issues have you come across? Have you had problems with your lover that arises from their 'past life' of a married person? Has this created problems in your relationship? Is 'baggage' and issue? Have you felt uncomfortable trying to meet perceived expectations, especially where children are involved?
Do you sometimes feel you aren't appreciated or, rather, thought of as a surrogate?Are you single, never married and dating someone who is recently divorced?
I married a man who had been married before. This was back in 1988. Ive been with him since 1985 though. We are till together, but what I came across was having to raise stepkids, because as soon as we married, the mother handed them over to us. I came across the mother calling our house all the time, the kids causing me grief. I went thru plenty. I still go thru things I dont want to. It comes with marrying someone who had been married with kids....It was my choice and my own fault. But we have a strong marriage and have been together for 23 yrs.*Are you single, never married and dating someone who is recently divorced?
Unfortunately, (I was a skeptic), but it takes a while to let go of a long relationship. I was married for 23 years and did not even give another moment to another man. He on the other hand was seeing other women or men on the sly. Hey, I don't have a problem with that, just tell me you aren't happy so we can move in different directions.
Yes, I am still angry and it has been almost 5 years. I am only angry at the way he belittled me and had zero respect for me or any other woman. He said the only time he had respect for me was when I graduated from college. Wow, what a blow.
It takes time to finally realize he and I both have our own insecurities. His are not mine and mine are not his. The hurt of an abusive relationship seems to make the ';moving forward'; harder.
I do not think it is a good idea to be in a ';rebound'; relationship especially after years of being with one person. This is like a ';death'; and you go through the different stages of grief. For some it takes longer then others.
Hope this helps a little.
Peace.
amanda
I am not dating anyone now, really. I have a girlfriend who lives 3 hours from me, but we aren't really dating. She is divorced, but I've never had any issues with her. She does, however, sometimes confide in me that she is unable to maintain a long-term relationship with a man for more than a year or two. I've known her for about 3 years now, but ours is a relationship based on friendship without any heavy attachments. I casually dated women who were divorced who seem to dwell on their ex husbands. Usually, I loose interest fast when, on a first date, the conversation is primarily about their ex husbands. It seems to me that it is common for women who have been divorced have trouble being in the present. If they have ';baggage'; it is ok with me as long as they acknowledge it, are not focused on it. In a sense, we all have baggage and this is part of the process of human growth.
There is someone else I know. We're friends but, married or not, we both have similar baggage. It has much to do with childhood issues, but her marriage was long and abusive; ';out of the pot, into the fire.';
I felt some expectations because I am the same astrological sign as her ex. There were some projections, I feel, but the more she understands me, the less of an issue it is.
____________________
( oh well...)
--------------------
o
o
@..@
.(----)
( )--( )
o0..0o
Do you sometimes feel you aren't appreciated or, rather, thought of as a surrogate?Are you single, never married and dating someone who is recently divorced?
I married a man who had been married before. This was back in 1988. Ive been with him since 1985 though. We are till together, but what I came across was having to raise stepkids, because as soon as we married, the mother handed them over to us. I came across the mother calling our house all the time, the kids causing me grief. I went thru plenty. I still go thru things I dont want to. It comes with marrying someone who had been married with kids....It was my choice and my own fault. But we have a strong marriage and have been together for 23 yrs.*Are you single, never married and dating someone who is recently divorced?
Unfortunately, (I was a skeptic), but it takes a while to let go of a long relationship. I was married for 23 years and did not even give another moment to another man. He on the other hand was seeing other women or men on the sly. Hey, I don't have a problem with that, just tell me you aren't happy so we can move in different directions.
Yes, I am still angry and it has been almost 5 years. I am only angry at the way he belittled me and had zero respect for me or any other woman. He said the only time he had respect for me was when I graduated from college. Wow, what a blow.
It takes time to finally realize he and I both have our own insecurities. His are not mine and mine are not his. The hurt of an abusive relationship seems to make the ';moving forward'; harder.
I do not think it is a good idea to be in a ';rebound'; relationship especially after years of being with one person. This is like a ';death'; and you go through the different stages of grief. For some it takes longer then others.
Hope this helps a little.
Peace.
amanda
I am not dating anyone now, really. I have a girlfriend who lives 3 hours from me, but we aren't really dating. She is divorced, but I've never had any issues with her. She does, however, sometimes confide in me that she is unable to maintain a long-term relationship with a man for more than a year or two. I've known her for about 3 years now, but ours is a relationship based on friendship without any heavy attachments. I casually dated women who were divorced who seem to dwell on their ex husbands. Usually, I loose interest fast when, on a first date, the conversation is primarily about their ex husbands. It seems to me that it is common for women who have been divorced have trouble being in the present. If they have ';baggage'; it is ok with me as long as they acknowledge it, are not focused on it. In a sense, we all have baggage and this is part of the process of human growth.
There is someone else I know. We're friends but, married or not, we both have similar baggage. It has much to do with childhood issues, but her marriage was long and abusive; ';out of the pot, into the fire.';
I felt some expectations because I am the same astrological sign as her ex. There were some projections, I feel, but the more she understands me, the less of an issue it is.
____________________
( oh well...)
--------------------
o
o
@..@
.(----)
( )--( )
o0..0o
Know anyone who got married at the Museum of the Shenandoah Valley?
I am thinking of driving out there next week to talk about their venue for my wedding next May, but I wanted to have some idea of what my expectations should be. Their website gives some information, but it's vague on prices and what's included in ';facility'; rental. I'm just curious if anyone got married there or knows someone who got married there and could point me towards another website or give me advice? Thanks!Know anyone who got married at the Museum of the Shenandoah Valley?
I've been there but never for a wedding or event. It's gorgeous though and would be nice. I would call and talk to someone who can give you the answers you need.
Not sure where you're coming from, but I attended a wedding at the Frontier Culture Museum in Staunton, VA. She got married in the Octagon Barn and used it for reception space along with plenty of outdoor space. It was pretty awesome but it is definitely not as formal at the SVM. If it's local, check it out: http://www.frontiermuseum.org
Good luck!
I've been there but never for a wedding or event. It's gorgeous though and would be nice. I would call and talk to someone who can give you the answers you need.
Not sure where you're coming from, but I attended a wedding at the Frontier Culture Museum in Staunton, VA. She got married in the Octagon Barn and used it for reception space along with plenty of outdoor space. It was pretty awesome but it is definitely not as formal at the SVM. If it's local, check it out: http://www.frontiermuseum.org
Good luck!
Is it proof that women just used men for money now that society no longer expects them to be married?
Now that its socially acceptable for females to be single, and more women prefer to BE single, is it proof positive that they were with and merely used men for generations for their financial support, food and money?Is it proof that women just used men for money now that society no longer expects them to be married?
women were dependent on men for these things in the past, yes. isn't it wonderful that we no longer are? :-)Is it proof that women just used men for money now that society no longer expects them to be married?
Not really.If we go back in time,we shall find that women were exploited more and that too,in the name of economic support to them in return for what all they did or were expected/forced to do.Also,the social acceptance for women to remain unmarried but economically self supporting, is not all about what you think but a social paradigm -shift brought about due to various reasons.
Of course it is!
Women had no choice but to marry a man with money becasue women had NO property rights! Women had no access to education let alone jobs! Marrying for love was secondary to marrying for money!
Men made the rules back then, so complain all you want dude, but you men made it that way so stop your whingeing! Do you know anything about history? Your own grandmother was probably forced to give up her job when she got married.
Also, where's your stats on 'more women prefer to be single'?
Geeps! Get real!
';Is it proof positive that they were with and merely used men for generations for their financial support, food and money?';
And without the ability to get an education or work in generations past (rules made by men), how, exactly, were women supposed to survive?
Yes and we both used each other. The lucky ones were actually in love and treated each other nice. I guess that was and is getting more rare.
Do you mean as opposed to men using them for sex, housecleaning, cooking, and bearing children? Then yes.
duhhhh....
how else are they supposed to raise a family, the hubby provides what the stay at home mom needs for the family.
Yes, but keep in mind how little fuss men raised about it.
If you believe that you will remain single.
...its mutual.....
nolotion cream
women were dependent on men for these things in the past, yes. isn't it wonderful that we no longer are? :-)Is it proof that women just used men for money now that society no longer expects them to be married?
Not really.If we go back in time,we shall find that women were exploited more and that too,in the name of economic support to them in return for what all they did or were expected/forced to do.Also,the social acceptance for women to remain unmarried but economically self supporting, is not all about what you think but a social paradigm -shift brought about due to various reasons.
Of course it is!
Women had no choice but to marry a man with money becasue women had NO property rights! Women had no access to education let alone jobs! Marrying for love was secondary to marrying for money!
Men made the rules back then, so complain all you want dude, but you men made it that way so stop your whingeing! Do you know anything about history? Your own grandmother was probably forced to give up her job when she got married.
Also, where's your stats on 'more women prefer to be single'?
Geeps! Get real!
';Is it proof positive that they were with and merely used men for generations for their financial support, food and money?';
And without the ability to get an education or work in generations past (rules made by men), how, exactly, were women supposed to survive?
Yes and we both used each other. The lucky ones were actually in love and treated each other nice. I guess that was and is getting more rare.
Do you mean as opposed to men using them for sex, housecleaning, cooking, and bearing children? Then yes.
duhhhh....
how else are they supposed to raise a family, the hubby provides what the stay at home mom needs for the family.
Yes, but keep in mind how little fuss men raised about it.
If you believe that you will remain single.
...its mutual.....
no
Should a couple get married after a year of being in a relationship?
They've been in a long distance relationship. However they see each other every month. They are very commited to each other. Both families are happy that they are together. The families met already. Oh and they are both 23 years and have carreers! What yall think?Should a couple get married after a year of being in a relationship?
my parents only knew each for three months before they got married and it was long distance...they met over the phone...and they have been together for 20 years and have 5 kidsShould a couple get married after a year of being in a relationship?
I would recommend waiting one more year. My husband and I were also in a long distance relationship and 23 years old the first year we were dating. As I recall, the relationship was still changing during the second year we were together. It was nothing too bad, but some of the excitement from when the relationship was brand new had worn off, and I missed it. There were still some moments when I was adjusting to the change and asking myself if this was the relationship I wanted. I'm glad I went through all of that before we got married.
You know its funny I knew my husband all his life but we stopped seeing each other when we were growing up he moved away and so did I but when I moved back to my lil town and so did he we reunited just as friends still as bestfriends then my senior year in high school we became a couple. And we both have carreers and we have 2 kids we been together 7 yrs. Soooooooooooo if they love each other and both families agree I would say Go 4 it!! Being in love is the best. I know I dont regret it
I think they get along so well because they don't see each other as much. They need to spend more time together before getting married. It's great that the families are so happy, get along, and everything but that doesn't mean that things will work out between the couple.
They just need to spend more time together before getting engaged.
Each couple's situation is different. there are some relationships that are so strong and have matured to the point that one year seems to be OK, but on the other hand, there are some that needs more time,more years.
Its has to feel totally right, for the both party involved. If there is a hint of doubt, or uncertainty then give it some time.
I say it can work and it can not work. For me it worked my Husband lived abroad i knew him 2 months and we get engaged then i went back, but we use to write and call each other a lot then after a year i got married to him. And we are married for almost 11 yrs. And of course you have ups %26amp; downs but that is in every relationship. Just they both have to be sure to tie the knot.
I'm for living with someone or at least seeing someone more than a few times a year or whatever it is. Long distance is cool sometimes but I mean, when you see someone every day for a year or two they can get on your nerves... do they love each other? Have they had that blowout fight yet (VERY Important)? You have to get through some hard times to know that it will work out. Don't want to be just another statistic of divorce rate right?
Well, i think they should wait a little longer cause there may be things that they dont know about each other and want like. If they know each other very well and think that they will last and be faithful to each other then i guess it will be okay.
In my opinion 1 year is too short I would see how things go for about 1-2 more years then decide on getting married
Good Luck x
I think when they are ready they will make the commitment. I wouldn't pressure them. Remember, patience is a virtue.
I think they should get married when they feel that it is right to get married.
It takes different amounts of time for different people.
if they think they are ready, then sure!
but i think before a couple gets married, they should try living together for a while. Just my opinion.
nO I THINK THEY STILL NEED MORE TIME TO GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER I THINK IN THE FIRST YEAR YOUR STILL GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHERS WAYS
oh no. they should def. give each other like arleast 2 more years. because in the end thier ganna end up getting a divorce.
I think that a year is too short but the way its been going lately 6months-year is very common... i perfer like 3 years or so
At least live in the same city for awhile.
my motto is... do what you do make it work for you 鈾櫕
haha
It sounds like they are ready...why not?
my parents only knew each for three months before they got married and it was long distance...they met over the phone...and they have been together for 20 years and have 5 kidsShould a couple get married after a year of being in a relationship?
I would recommend waiting one more year. My husband and I were also in a long distance relationship and 23 years old the first year we were dating. As I recall, the relationship was still changing during the second year we were together. It was nothing too bad, but some of the excitement from when the relationship was brand new had worn off, and I missed it. There were still some moments when I was adjusting to the change and asking myself if this was the relationship I wanted. I'm glad I went through all of that before we got married.
You know its funny I knew my husband all his life but we stopped seeing each other when we were growing up he moved away and so did I but when I moved back to my lil town and so did he we reunited just as friends still as bestfriends then my senior year in high school we became a couple. And we both have carreers and we have 2 kids we been together 7 yrs. Soooooooooooo if they love each other and both families agree I would say Go 4 it!! Being in love is the best. I know I dont regret it
I think they get along so well because they don't see each other as much. They need to spend more time together before getting married. It's great that the families are so happy, get along, and everything but that doesn't mean that things will work out between the couple.
They just need to spend more time together before getting engaged.
Each couple's situation is different. there are some relationships that are so strong and have matured to the point that one year seems to be OK, but on the other hand, there are some that needs more time,more years.
Its has to feel totally right, for the both party involved. If there is a hint of doubt, or uncertainty then give it some time.
I say it can work and it can not work. For me it worked my Husband lived abroad i knew him 2 months and we get engaged then i went back, but we use to write and call each other a lot then after a year i got married to him. And we are married for almost 11 yrs. And of course you have ups %26amp; downs but that is in every relationship. Just they both have to be sure to tie the knot.
I'm for living with someone or at least seeing someone more than a few times a year or whatever it is. Long distance is cool sometimes but I mean, when you see someone every day for a year or two they can get on your nerves... do they love each other? Have they had that blowout fight yet (VERY Important)? You have to get through some hard times to know that it will work out. Don't want to be just another statistic of divorce rate right?
Well, i think they should wait a little longer cause there may be things that they dont know about each other and want like. If they know each other very well and think that they will last and be faithful to each other then i guess it will be okay.
In my opinion 1 year is too short I would see how things go for about 1-2 more years then decide on getting married
Good Luck x
I think when they are ready they will make the commitment. I wouldn't pressure them. Remember, patience is a virtue.
I think they should get married when they feel that it is right to get married.
It takes different amounts of time for different people.
if they think they are ready, then sure!
but i think before a couple gets married, they should try living together for a while. Just my opinion.
nO I THINK THEY STILL NEED MORE TIME TO GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER I THINK IN THE FIRST YEAR YOUR STILL GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHERS WAYS
oh no. they should def. give each other like arleast 2 more years. because in the end thier ganna end up getting a divorce.
I think that a year is too short but the way its been going lately 6months-year is very common... i perfer like 3 years or so
At least live in the same city for awhile.
my motto is... do what you do make it work for you 鈾櫕
haha
It sounds like they are ready...why not?
Can international visitors getting married in Australia?
eg. One is from country A, the other from country B. Both are staying in Australia on temporary visa.Can international visitors getting married in Australia?
Although Australia has six states, two territories and several island protectorates the marriage law is the same nationwide - international visitor couples who wish to be married in Australia are required to submit a Notice of Intended Marriage with their choosen officiant (available from a Births, Deaths %26amp; Marriages Registry Office in a State or Territory's capital city). The form must be submitted at least one month before the marriage is to take place (and no earlier than six months before the marriage). This form must be signed and witnesses either by an Australian Consular Official or Diplomatic Officer.
Personal identification (such as a passport, birth certificate etc.) is also required. Check with your officiant to ensure you have the correct legal identification.
A Civil Marriage officiant can marry couples anywhere, anytime. Two witnesses over 18 are also required but they need not be personally acquainted with you.
There is a nominal lodgement fee and the officiant will tell you how much they charge for the ceremony and travel. Most Civil Marriage officiants charge about $200. Original birth certificates or passports must be sighted and if you have been married before, then an original death certificate or a final divorce paper must be seen to show how the last marriage ended.
There are several helpful websites; here are two (chosen at random):
http://mag.weddingcentral.com.au/wedding鈥?/a>
http://www.ultimatewedding.com/articles/鈥?/a>
Although Australia has six states, two territories and several island protectorates the marriage law is the same nationwide - international visitor couples who wish to be married in Australia are required to submit a Notice of Intended Marriage with their choosen officiant (available from a Births, Deaths %26amp; Marriages Registry Office in a State or Territory's capital city). The form must be submitted at least one month before the marriage is to take place (and no earlier than six months before the marriage). This form must be signed and witnesses either by an Australian Consular Official or Diplomatic Officer.
Personal identification (such as a passport, birth certificate etc.) is also required. Check with your officiant to ensure you have the correct legal identification.
A Civil Marriage officiant can marry couples anywhere, anytime. Two witnesses over 18 are also required but they need not be personally acquainted with you.
There is a nominal lodgement fee and the officiant will tell you how much they charge for the ceremony and travel. Most Civil Marriage officiants charge about $200. Original birth certificates or passports must be sighted and if you have been married before, then an original death certificate or a final divorce paper must be seen to show how the last marriage ended.
There are several helpful websites; here are two (chosen at random):
http://mag.weddingcentral.com.au/wedding鈥?/a>
http://www.ultimatewedding.com/articles/鈥?/a>
I have not seen my husband since 2 months after we married in 1997. We have nothing together. I need a divorce?
I am told by his ex best friend that he has about 5 children with someone else... I have no Idea what state he is in or a clue in the world where he is at. I dont care where he is. I need to know if I am already divorced since its been 12 yrs or if I can get a one signature divorce. I dont remember anything about him but his name, and that he has family in Texas. THATS IT. I need advice.I have not seen my husband since 2 months after we married in 1997. We have nothing together. I need a divorce?
yeah you need a divorce, get a divorce by default. you need to feel out some papers get them from the court house. run and add in the paper for him asking for the divorce for 4 weeks in a row, you miss one week you will have to start the add over again. and after that go in front of the judge and get a divorce. it's called a divorce by default, I got one.I have not seen my husband since 2 months after we married in 1997. We have nothing together. I need a divorce?
Unless you divorce, you are still married. File it and they can process i without him if you can prove you cannot find him.
I fail to believe you know NOTHING about a man you married though, you would have more information than that on your marriage license.
You should be able to file for an uncontested pro se divorce with no problem. Check with the Clerk on what to do when it comes to abandonment. Every state is different.
Yeah, the system sucks, your still married. Until BOTH of you sign the divorce papers it's not final. There is a way that just one person can sign but you have to talk to a judge/lawyer.
Odd, very odd! Get a lawyer, let him/her figure this out. Messy!
Get a Lawyer. That would be my advice. They will sort everything out.
no-way, you must be joking.
I'd suggest you do exactly what Jessie said.
I have never been through anything like that, but my best friend got married and the guy turned out to be an abusive piece of s**t! It took her a while to leave him because she was scared to death that he'd come after her, but eventually she got a chance to leave and she took it. She hid for a while then she moved and met someone else a couple years later. Now, she has been with the other person she met (after she left her husband) for over 4 years and they are in the process of planning their wedding for May 2010. Anyway, she has tried to find her husband so she could try to get the divorce, but she can't find him. So, she's doing exactly what Jessie suggested you do. She's running the add in the paper and then getting her divorce, so you should do that and just be done with it.
Good luck! : )
yeah you need a divorce, get a divorce by default. you need to feel out some papers get them from the court house. run and add in the paper for him asking for the divorce for 4 weeks in a row, you miss one week you will have to start the add over again. and after that go in front of the judge and get a divorce. it's called a divorce by default, I got one.I have not seen my husband since 2 months after we married in 1997. We have nothing together. I need a divorce?
Unless you divorce, you are still married. File it and they can process i without him if you can prove you cannot find him.
I fail to believe you know NOTHING about a man you married though, you would have more information than that on your marriage license.
You should be able to file for an uncontested pro se divorce with no problem. Check with the Clerk on what to do when it comes to abandonment. Every state is different.
Yeah, the system sucks, your still married. Until BOTH of you sign the divorce papers it's not final. There is a way that just one person can sign but you have to talk to a judge/lawyer.
Odd, very odd! Get a lawyer, let him/her figure this out. Messy!
Get a Lawyer. That would be my advice. They will sort everything out.
no-way, you must be joking.
I'd suggest you do exactly what Jessie said.
I have never been through anything like that, but my best friend got married and the guy turned out to be an abusive piece of s**t! It took her a while to leave him because she was scared to death that he'd come after her, but eventually she got a chance to leave and she took it. She hid for a while then she moved and met someone else a couple years later. Now, she has been with the other person she met (after she left her husband) for over 4 years and they are in the process of planning their wedding for May 2010. Anyway, she has tried to find her husband so she could try to get the divorce, but she can't find him. So, she's doing exactly what Jessie suggested you do. She's running the add in the paper and then getting her divorce, so you should do that and just be done with it.
Good luck! : )
Do you think a married mother of 2 could get a part time job as a cougar?
I'm thinking of placing an ad in the Pennysaver. Do you think it could work?Do you think a married mother of 2 could get a part time job as a cougar?
I'm your first customer, name your price(I'll pay anything for you).
Look out here comes the babby batter.Do you think a married mother of 2 could get a part time job as a cougar?
I'm hiring RIGHT NOW.
Would you like an application ? I think you have the credentials I'm looking for...
NO, Really I do.
EDIT: Jili late 30's up...cougars are fun. They scratch the hell outta your back and draw blood.
Sure! Juno found Vanessa and Mark in the Pennysaver and look at all the shenanigans that resulted from that! Anything is possible!
Absolutely..wait a minute, I thought we were MILFs. What age do you have to be to be a cougar? We need to find this out..inquiring minds wanna know.
why is it when a woman goes aftedr a younger man she is a Cougar and if a older man does this he's a perv???????
you obviously have no idea what people mean by a cougar when talking about a woman.
what a troll....!
it would, but you're too young! your boy-toy would still be in his preteens!
that's freaking awesome! but i'm not sure its that different than being a callgirl.
yes
Yes, ma'am! I know some single guys if your really interested.
go for it... :D
yeh y not!!go 4 it
no buts thats just my oppion it will not to be mean but slut(@#y
I'm your first customer, name your price(I'll pay anything for you).
Look out here comes the babby batter.Do you think a married mother of 2 could get a part time job as a cougar?
I'm hiring RIGHT NOW.
Would you like an application ? I think you have the credentials I'm looking for...
NO, Really I do.
EDIT: Jili late 30's up...cougars are fun. They scratch the hell outta your back and draw blood.
Sure! Juno found Vanessa and Mark in the Pennysaver and look at all the shenanigans that resulted from that! Anything is possible!
Absolutely..wait a minute, I thought we were MILFs. What age do you have to be to be a cougar? We need to find this out..inquiring minds wanna know.
why is it when a woman goes aftedr a younger man she is a Cougar and if a older man does this he's a perv???????
you obviously have no idea what people mean by a cougar when talking about a woman.
what a troll....!
it would, but you're too young! your boy-toy would still be in his preteens!
that's freaking awesome! but i'm not sure its that different than being a callgirl.
yes
Yes, ma'am! I know some single guys if your really interested.
go for it... :D
yeh y not!!go 4 it
no buts thats just my oppion it will not to be mean but slut(@#y
My gf is US citizen and we are going to get married. i want to register and start a business in the US. How?
although i work a good 9-5 job and have a strong work visa for almost 4 more years and I do not need her to do anything from an immigration stand point, I heard that she can apply for an adjustment of status for me and also apply for an employment permit for me (which i dont need for work, but can i use an EAD card to start my business?). at what point in the process will i be eligible to register my own company? how long into the process? and what should be my minimum status to start a company in my name?My gf is US citizen and we are going to get married. i want to register and start a business in the US. How?
get your green card first !My gf is US citizen and we are going to get married. i want to register and start a business in the US. How?
if u want accurate info then call uscis 1-800-375-5283. have u filed ur I129F to be married? ull need the receipt number for that also ull need ur visa number. good luck!lotion cream
get your green card first !My gf is US citizen and we are going to get married. i want to register and start a business in the US. How?
if u want accurate info then call uscis 1-800-375-5283. have u filed ur I129F to be married? ull need the receipt number for that also ull need ur visa number. good luck!
What is best for married Biz Partners?
Both spouses will be working on the business.
Is it okay to use a sole propietorship and treat one of the spouses as an employee?
Or is it better to draw up a partnership with percentages assigned to each spouse?
What are the implications were the marriage to go south?What is best for married Biz Partners?
To the best of my knowledge I would choose for the business to be incorporated over sole proprietor...many advantages to this. Also, you would be able to keep the business and personal assets separate, allowing one spouse to buy the other out or splitting the business assets and going separate if a divorce shall arise.
Is it okay to use a sole propietorship and treat one of the spouses as an employee?
Or is it better to draw up a partnership with percentages assigned to each spouse?
What are the implications were the marriage to go south?What is best for married Biz Partners?
To the best of my knowledge I would choose for the business to be incorporated over sole proprietor...many advantages to this. Also, you would be able to keep the business and personal assets separate, allowing one spouse to buy the other out or splitting the business assets and going separate if a divorce shall arise.
What % do you think married men have affairs?
I mean if they have a crush on a female coworker but it is innocent so far, it appears. I say 30%, despite what statistics say. I think most of the time men and women are too scared of the reprecussions %26amp; their morals prevent them from having an affair. I think this is the case when innocent flirting is going on, versus non innocent flirting. What % do you think married men have affairs?
90% of them have thought of it but 60% out of it don't do it because they could not afford to do it due to job, kids or they are dependable on their wives emotionally %26amp; sexually. So, left the 30% with 11% of them leaving their wives for the other women, so 19% of them are cowards.
Wondering what happen to the 10%? Well simply because 5% or them are pervert %26amp; remaining 5% have erectile dysfunction!What % do you think married men have affairs?
I disagree partly of what you asked. I think the percentage rate is lower (around 10%) because of exactly what you said...the repercussions when they get caught.
Polls of things like this vary so greatly from region, background, social setting, willingness of men taking the poll, so on and so forth. Get 100 men in one room and a 100 in another and the percentage rate is going to be different
Actually, defining the difference between a affair or a ';fling'; is important. Affair being a relationship that is ongoing and a fling is a quick one timer.
That's what I think anyway.
What % do you think married women have affairs?
I mean if they have a crush on a male coworker but it is innocent so far, it appears. I say 80%, despite what statistics say. I think most of the time women and men are too scared of the repercussions %26amp; their morals prevent them from having an affair. I think this is the case when innocent flirting is going on, versus non innocent flirting.
plus, i spelled repercussions right.
A large survey of 30,000 married couples was completed in 2004.
70% of married men and 40% of married women admitted anonymously to having an affair.
there is nothing innocent about flirting when your married.with flirting there is always a chance it will turn into a full blown affair.
I will say 50% which is what i think and innocent affairs. It a sort of heat and run a nd it does not last and not serious.
I agree with you. These figures in the media do not reflect my experience. Not one of my good friends has had an affair that I know of. And neither has any of their wives.
you know i never could comprehend cheating.just don't get why people do.i never did.(divorced for different reasons).but i would agree around 30%or so.
Regardless of what the stats say, I think it is equal between both men and women.
It is said :
75% of the married men cheat in USA %26amp; the remaining 25% cheat in Europe !!!
If you are married there is no such thing as innocent flirting.
100%
Harriet
99%? remaining 1% is either extinct or taken.....
well i reckon a lot of flirting goes on but its a low percentage that actually Carry's it through,I would say 10 to 20 %
The most common % over the years has been about 80%.
99.99999999%
90% of them have thought of it but 60% out of it don't do it because they could not afford to do it due to job, kids or they are dependable on their wives emotionally %26amp; sexually. So, left the 30% with 11% of them leaving their wives for the other women, so 19% of them are cowards.
Wondering what happen to the 10%? Well simply because 5% or them are pervert %26amp; remaining 5% have erectile dysfunction!What % do you think married men have affairs?
I disagree partly of what you asked. I think the percentage rate is lower (around 10%) because of exactly what you said...the repercussions when they get caught.
Polls of things like this vary so greatly from region, background, social setting, willingness of men taking the poll, so on and so forth. Get 100 men in one room and a 100 in another and the percentage rate is going to be different
Actually, defining the difference between a affair or a ';fling'; is important. Affair being a relationship that is ongoing and a fling is a quick one timer.
That's what I think anyway.
What % do you think married women have affairs?
I mean if they have a crush on a male coworker but it is innocent so far, it appears. I say 80%, despite what statistics say. I think most of the time women and men are too scared of the repercussions %26amp; their morals prevent them from having an affair. I think this is the case when innocent flirting is going on, versus non innocent flirting.
plus, i spelled repercussions right.
A large survey of 30,000 married couples was completed in 2004.
70% of married men and 40% of married women admitted anonymously to having an affair.
there is nothing innocent about flirting when your married.with flirting there is always a chance it will turn into a full blown affair.
I will say 50% which is what i think and innocent affairs. It a sort of heat and run a nd it does not last and not serious.
I agree with you. These figures in the media do not reflect my experience. Not one of my good friends has had an affair that I know of. And neither has any of their wives.
you know i never could comprehend cheating.just don't get why people do.i never did.(divorced for different reasons).but i would agree around 30%or so.
Regardless of what the stats say, I think it is equal between both men and women.
It is said :
75% of the married men cheat in USA %26amp; the remaining 25% cheat in Europe !!!
If you are married there is no such thing as innocent flirting.
100%
Harriet
99%? remaining 1% is either extinct or taken.....
well i reckon a lot of flirting goes on but its a low percentage that actually Carry's it through,I would say 10 to 20 %
The most common % over the years has been about 80%.
99.99999999%
Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?
Me and my boyfriend have been going out for 10 months now but we have known eachother a lot longer than that. Hes always talking abour getting married and what it would be like. And he really wants to but he wants to right away.
Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?
YES. My mom got married at age 19 and 30 years later she has regret. She never had the chance to experience life as a young woman. While girls her age are going to clubs and going to college, my mom was doing laundry!Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?
I don't think that is too young to get engaged or married. However, the way you are saying ';he really wants to but he wants to right away'; makes it seem like he is trying to pressure you into something you don't want, and like you are trying to use your ages as an excuse to not do it. Obviously this would not be a good situation to get married under.
I don't know what your situation is with sex, but if you haven't been sexually active with him, and especially if you're someone who would rather wait until marriage, I would suspect he is playing the engagement/wedding card for the sole purpose of getting some action. As in, he wants to be able to say ';well, now we're engaged, so it's okay for us to have sex!';
Of course, it's possible I'm seeing things in what you've written that aren't there, but please, have a think about these issues before you even consider staying with this guy at all, much less marrying him.
me and my wife where engaged when we where 18, after the summer of our senior year. We went off to college began that and planned our wedding for 2 years down the road. everything was great and we where married 3 months ago. i dont think its too young to get married but you need to be engaged for a little while, and also understand how the two of you will be once you get out of high school and start your adult lives. you need to make sure you have a plan and a foundation for you life and your family.
I believe that it is, I was married at 23 and I got divorced at 25. I'm sure both of you love each other, but I Feel that you two need more time to explore both of your interests after high school.
If you two are very committed, then continue seeing each other but please don't make a lifelong commitment if you are sure you can't give 100% to each other.
Don't make the same mistake I made, wait it out a bit longer. It will be worth it in the long run.
Hey! it is quite a young age to get engaged but you dont have to rush into the marriage! if you get engaged now it proves commitment for you and your partner to eachother but dont rush into the wedding wait a few years and make sure its the right thing for you to do, and if you do get engaged and everybody knows dont just go through with the wedding because everybody expects you too just because your engaged,see how it goes, good luck xxx
Well I got engaged when I was 18 still a senior in HS. My husband at the time was 23. Although he proposed to me, we never discussed the wedding. All I cared about is graduating. After I grad, we both wanted to live together first then worry about getting married.
Well as days, weeks, months and years past. We never planned a wedding, just continue to live together. Making and paying bills together. The only thing that didn't make us a married couple was the marriage license. It didn't bother us after awhile of not being married. We were in love and commitment to each other, didn't need a piece of people to tell us that.
We were engaged for 5yrs. Married now for 3yrs. Been together for 10yrs.
Well I think you should definitly wait a few years to get married, especially since you haven't been together that long, regardless of how long you've known each other.
But if you want to get engaged and have a long engagement, then go for it. I would definitly go to college and graduate from there first before getting married though. Both of you.
This age is far too young to get married as you should be out there travelling or working and saving money. Even getting engaged might be a buzz for you right now, but believe me you are really too young to know what you are truly looking for in a partner. How do I know you ask?, because I have been there and done this and have regretted doing so all my life.
YES! There is a 66%+ divorce rate. Let's say that again. You have better odds of winning in Vegas than staying married. AND, you will change so much in your 20's that NOTHING you want or are interested in now will be of interest to you in your late 20's. You'll grow apart. Don't be the 30 year single mom with 2 kids hunting for husband number two. There are plenty of them at every happy hour in every bar in your town, every night of the week. Go look around and see them for yourself. Study them. Imagine being one, hoping to land a new husband who will accept your baggage. Then blow off your boyfriend, get out and have fun for a few years dating as many guys as possible.
You still have a long way ahead. Take your time. Don't pressure yourselves to get married. If you were really meant for each other whatever happens, married or not, you'll still be together. Sometimes you thought you know each other very well, but, it's not until you live together in one same roof. Trust me. You're only 18 %26amp; 19, give yourselves an allowance till 23 or 24, then decide. At least, at this age you're matured and have your own profession as well as savings for your future family.
i was 20 and he was 23 when we got engaged after being together 3 years but we are now 24 and 27 and only just set the date for next year as we got side tracked by buying a house.
do what feels right when it feels right i say but you've not been together long at all so don't even think about marriage! if your going to be together forever, whats the rush? get settled first ie jobs house etc. then start thinking about it.
Pull the reigns in on that horse, and tell him to slow down. Yes, 18 is way too young to get married. Please live your teen life till it's fullest. Marriage comes with HUGE Responsiblities including a TON Of bills. None of which an 18 or 19 year old can handle. Get engaged, that is fine, but please wait until you are older to get married.
I dont think it's too young to get engaged if the couple is planning on having a long engagment and starting thier higher educations befor planning a wedding. It's definatly too young to be married though, your still learning who you are and what you want in life at 18 and 19.
Yes its way too young. I dont think that people realize that turning 21 is a big deal maybe one of you will enjoy drinking perhaps the other wont... it can cause problems.
If you two think you can make a marriage last then what is the rush? Stay in the relationship and wait it out until at least 22.
you still have college ahead of you and so on, just wait and see
Personally I believe the success rate is much better if you wait until your early 30's and have children in your mid to late 30's but it is a personal choice
You will have to really work at communication and keeping life interesting between the two of you as a couple if you marry that young
It depends what sort of person you are....
If you're mature and know you're going to stay with this person, then engagement should go ahead but marriage, you should think about.
Ask yourself the question: Am I happy to be stuck/with this person for the rest of my life (or somewhat 60 years..)
I got married at 19. My husband is 20. I don't feel it is to young. Some people do it see as young. But if you are sure that is what you want and will be happy. Do it. People all the time get married young. Good luck!
Yes, I think it's too young. You are not fully adults yet, and there is a chance you will either grow up together, or grow apart. Get engaged, if you must. But, don't get married!!
too young for marraige, too young for engagement too. wait another 8 years or so. you have no idea how much you will change in the next 8 years.
No, it's not too young. But if it were me, I'd wait at least another year...
Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?
YES. My mom got married at age 19 and 30 years later she has regret. She never had the chance to experience life as a young woman. While girls her age are going to clubs and going to college, my mom was doing laundry!Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?
I don't think that is too young to get engaged or married. However, the way you are saying ';he really wants to but he wants to right away'; makes it seem like he is trying to pressure you into something you don't want, and like you are trying to use your ages as an excuse to not do it. Obviously this would not be a good situation to get married under.
I don't know what your situation is with sex, but if you haven't been sexually active with him, and especially if you're someone who would rather wait until marriage, I would suspect he is playing the engagement/wedding card for the sole purpose of getting some action. As in, he wants to be able to say ';well, now we're engaged, so it's okay for us to have sex!';
Of course, it's possible I'm seeing things in what you've written that aren't there, but please, have a think about these issues before you even consider staying with this guy at all, much less marrying him.
me and my wife where engaged when we where 18, after the summer of our senior year. We went off to college began that and planned our wedding for 2 years down the road. everything was great and we where married 3 months ago. i dont think its too young to get married but you need to be engaged for a little while, and also understand how the two of you will be once you get out of high school and start your adult lives. you need to make sure you have a plan and a foundation for you life and your family.
I believe that it is, I was married at 23 and I got divorced at 25. I'm sure both of you love each other, but I Feel that you two need more time to explore both of your interests after high school.
If you two are very committed, then continue seeing each other but please don't make a lifelong commitment if you are sure you can't give 100% to each other.
Don't make the same mistake I made, wait it out a bit longer. It will be worth it in the long run.
Hey! it is quite a young age to get engaged but you dont have to rush into the marriage! if you get engaged now it proves commitment for you and your partner to eachother but dont rush into the wedding wait a few years and make sure its the right thing for you to do, and if you do get engaged and everybody knows dont just go through with the wedding because everybody expects you too just because your engaged,see how it goes, good luck xxx
Well I got engaged when I was 18 still a senior in HS. My husband at the time was 23. Although he proposed to me, we never discussed the wedding. All I cared about is graduating. After I grad, we both wanted to live together first then worry about getting married.
Well as days, weeks, months and years past. We never planned a wedding, just continue to live together. Making and paying bills together. The only thing that didn't make us a married couple was the marriage license. It didn't bother us after awhile of not being married. We were in love and commitment to each other, didn't need a piece of people to tell us that.
We were engaged for 5yrs. Married now for 3yrs. Been together for 10yrs.
Well I think you should definitly wait a few years to get married, especially since you haven't been together that long, regardless of how long you've known each other.
But if you want to get engaged and have a long engagement, then go for it. I would definitly go to college and graduate from there first before getting married though. Both of you.
This age is far too young to get married as you should be out there travelling or working and saving money. Even getting engaged might be a buzz for you right now, but believe me you are really too young to know what you are truly looking for in a partner. How do I know you ask?, because I have been there and done this and have regretted doing so all my life.
YES! There is a 66%+ divorce rate. Let's say that again. You have better odds of winning in Vegas than staying married. AND, you will change so much in your 20's that NOTHING you want or are interested in now will be of interest to you in your late 20's. You'll grow apart. Don't be the 30 year single mom with 2 kids hunting for husband number two. There are plenty of them at every happy hour in every bar in your town, every night of the week. Go look around and see them for yourself. Study them. Imagine being one, hoping to land a new husband who will accept your baggage. Then blow off your boyfriend, get out and have fun for a few years dating as many guys as possible.
You still have a long way ahead. Take your time. Don't pressure yourselves to get married. If you were really meant for each other whatever happens, married or not, you'll still be together. Sometimes you thought you know each other very well, but, it's not until you live together in one same roof. Trust me. You're only 18 %26amp; 19, give yourselves an allowance till 23 or 24, then decide. At least, at this age you're matured and have your own profession as well as savings for your future family.
i was 20 and he was 23 when we got engaged after being together 3 years but we are now 24 and 27 and only just set the date for next year as we got side tracked by buying a house.
do what feels right when it feels right i say but you've not been together long at all so don't even think about marriage! if your going to be together forever, whats the rush? get settled first ie jobs house etc. then start thinking about it.
Pull the reigns in on that horse, and tell him to slow down. Yes, 18 is way too young to get married. Please live your teen life till it's fullest. Marriage comes with HUGE Responsiblities including a TON Of bills. None of which an 18 or 19 year old can handle. Get engaged, that is fine, but please wait until you are older to get married.
I dont think it's too young to get engaged if the couple is planning on having a long engagment and starting thier higher educations befor planning a wedding. It's definatly too young to be married though, your still learning who you are and what you want in life at 18 and 19.
Yes its way too young. I dont think that people realize that turning 21 is a big deal maybe one of you will enjoy drinking perhaps the other wont... it can cause problems.
If you two think you can make a marriage last then what is the rush? Stay in the relationship and wait it out until at least 22.
you still have college ahead of you and so on, just wait and see
Personally I believe the success rate is much better if you wait until your early 30's and have children in your mid to late 30's but it is a personal choice
You will have to really work at communication and keeping life interesting between the two of you as a couple if you marry that young
It depends what sort of person you are....
If you're mature and know you're going to stay with this person, then engagement should go ahead but marriage, you should think about.
Ask yourself the question: Am I happy to be stuck/with this person for the rest of my life (or somewhat 60 years..)
I got married at 19. My husband is 20. I don't feel it is to young. Some people do it see as young. But if you are sure that is what you want and will be happy. Do it. People all the time get married young. Good luck!
Yes, I think it's too young. You are not fully adults yet, and there is a chance you will either grow up together, or grow apart. Get engaged, if you must. But, don't get married!!
too young for marraige, too young for engagement too. wait another 8 years or so. you have no idea how much you will change in the next 8 years.
No, it's not too young. But if it were me, I'd wait at least another year...
How should a newly married couple live? Is it good to live with in-laws?
Very bad idea....How should a newly married couple live? Is it good to live with in-laws?
Coming from someone who currently lives with the In-Laws, I really don't recommend it. If you can, I would try to avoid it at all costs. There's nothing like having your own place and privacy to go with it because when you live with them you have none. They know all your routines and nothing remains private. Plus, it gives them an opportunity to judge and criticize you more because they are around you. Marriage is hard enough as it is and it takes a lot of work and effort from both sides with the occasional added stress. Why would you want to add more stress to the marriage by living with your In-Laws? A newly married couple should live alone without the influence, judgment, and invasion of others privacy. Please take my advice into consideration and Best of Luck to you both!How should a newly married couple live? Is it good to live with in-laws?
Hell no!
Get your own place (I take it you have not lived together before) - besides, a house should be a wedding present from your daddy!
Will no life at all.
http://www.idearibbon.com
DO NOT live with the in-laws. The best thing for your marriage will be privacy, independence and self-reliance. Do what you have to do to stay on your own.
Live on your own so you can enjoy the specialness, the privacy and the spontaneity. Don't live with your in-laws - even if you love them lots, that's just inviting trouble.
ohhh no in laws pls,its always better to be away so that the love and care remains in hearts rather than living togethre and fighting over every little thing and then moving away,which is too late cos it takes hardly and time for relations to get sour!
NO! your marriage wont last if the in-laws are there
no no no thye will interfere in your business. you need privacy and when yu have fights you dont want to have them chose sides
I've never been married, but it seems like it would SUCK to live with in-laws. If it's totally necessary, cause of money or something else, well you gotta do what you gotta do. But I think it would suck. Good luck!
Thats a BAD ideal to live with the in-laws. Most people cant get along with their in-law in the first place, others can but living with them is different. Most of them try to run your life, and push their views on you about how things should be done. It gets annoying real quick. I love my in-laws but would NEVER live with them. Unless it was the case where they was old and had medical issues where they need someone to look after them and care for them.
I dont know why pple r saying NO NO NO.I dont know where the person is from whos has asked this question. I am from India.If I can manage to live with my parents for all the years b4 mariage then why cant One adjust with their in-laws? They are like your parents only. So wats the prob?
living with in laws is a no no for me. it's better to live in a small place with just the two of you than living with in laws
Do not live with in laws.
i believe that if you cannot live on your own and fully support yourselves then you should not get married.
it's a bad idea for a married couple to live with anyone besides the 2 of them.
Heavens no! Even a small studio apartment establishes the home as yours.......save living with the folks for when alzheimers sets in.
You've lived in their home, now its time to make your own!
Live and let live. It depends on the in laws.
a big fat NO NO NO NO...... if you can not afford to marry and be on your own, then wait till you have the money to do so..... God bless
no cause they will never let you live your married lives and they will always interfere with your decision making, start looking for your own space even if it is hard, you'll be happy you did.
HAPPY !!! and the only way to be that is not to live with In-laws!!!
DO NOT Do IT!
Never with the in laws. NEVER. Even if you have to live in a one room apartment live on your own.
What this old woman has to say about living with in-laws is not on you life if you have any other choice. I lived with my died husbands Mother for awhile and it was okay but if I had my way I would live in a big two or three room tent at a lake or in the desert. Good luck and best wishes.
Well it's upto you. Some of them are really friendly and caring while some can be cruel and can ruin your life. You know them, right? You decide if you can spend everyday with them and if you'll enjoy it.
This is from personal experience, please, please do not live with either your parents or his. It will be total disaster. If you do get along with either set, you won't after you start living with them. There will be an unbelievable amount of tension in the house. Tempers will fly, they will not be able to keep out of your business, they will want to tell you how to live, how to spend you money, where to work, when to work. It will be unbearable for you and your spouse. I had to live with my in-laws for a year and a half. I was miserable, I cried myself to sleep every night because my mother in law said mean horrible things to me. My husband wouldn't stand up to her. I finally told her off. I found a home up for auction and took my husband to see it and told him that we could buy it or we could divorce. We still live in that home 8 1/2 yrs later. This is testament to NOT LIVING WITH ANY INLAWS.
If you are old enough to get married, you are old enough to support yourselves and get your own place. If you weren't ready financially, maybe you should have waited...Well, I guess it is too late for that now, look for an affordable apartment and I do mean affordable...it won't be the best, but at least you will have each other.Time to grow up guys, mom and dad did their job, don't impose on them. Parents don't often say it, but they like their time alone after all the kids are grown and moved out. Time to go....
i have to say that i live with my fionce's parents right now and i'ts not a good idea - don't do it. save up and get a place of your own; his/her mom will drive you nuts. you can never be 'good enough' for thier child. don't do it.
NEVER EVER LIVE WITH YOUR IN-LAWS...YOU WILL END UP GETTING A DIVORCE!!!
That is an awful idea!
You gotta make it on your own, if that means doing it tough, so be it.
Coming from someone who currently lives with the In-Laws, I really don't recommend it. If you can, I would try to avoid it at all costs. There's nothing like having your own place and privacy to go with it because when you live with them you have none. They know all your routines and nothing remains private. Plus, it gives them an opportunity to judge and criticize you more because they are around you. Marriage is hard enough as it is and it takes a lot of work and effort from both sides with the occasional added stress. Why would you want to add more stress to the marriage by living with your In-Laws? A newly married couple should live alone without the influence, judgment, and invasion of others privacy. Please take my advice into consideration and Best of Luck to you both!How should a newly married couple live? Is it good to live with in-laws?
Hell no!
Get your own place (I take it you have not lived together before) - besides, a house should be a wedding present from your daddy!
Will no life at all.
http://www.idearibbon.com
DO NOT live with the in-laws. The best thing for your marriage will be privacy, independence and self-reliance. Do what you have to do to stay on your own.
Live on your own so you can enjoy the specialness, the privacy and the spontaneity. Don't live with your in-laws - even if you love them lots, that's just inviting trouble.
ohhh no in laws pls,its always better to be away so that the love and care remains in hearts rather than living togethre and fighting over every little thing and then moving away,which is too late cos it takes hardly and time for relations to get sour!
NO! your marriage wont last if the in-laws are there
no no no thye will interfere in your business. you need privacy and when yu have fights you dont want to have them chose sides
I've never been married, but it seems like it would SUCK to live with in-laws. If it's totally necessary, cause of money or something else, well you gotta do what you gotta do. But I think it would suck. Good luck!
Thats a BAD ideal to live with the in-laws. Most people cant get along with their in-law in the first place, others can but living with them is different. Most of them try to run your life, and push their views on you about how things should be done. It gets annoying real quick. I love my in-laws but would NEVER live with them. Unless it was the case where they was old and had medical issues where they need someone to look after them and care for them.
I dont know why pple r saying NO NO NO.I dont know where the person is from whos has asked this question. I am from India.If I can manage to live with my parents for all the years b4 mariage then why cant One adjust with their in-laws? They are like your parents only. So wats the prob?
living with in laws is a no no for me. it's better to live in a small place with just the two of you than living with in laws
Do not live with in laws.
i believe that if you cannot live on your own and fully support yourselves then you should not get married.
it's a bad idea for a married couple to live with anyone besides the 2 of them.
Heavens no! Even a small studio apartment establishes the home as yours.......save living with the folks for when alzheimers sets in.
You've lived in their home, now its time to make your own!
Live and let live. It depends on the in laws.
a big fat NO NO NO NO...... if you can not afford to marry and be on your own, then wait till you have the money to do so..... God bless
no cause they will never let you live your married lives and they will always interfere with your decision making, start looking for your own space even if it is hard, you'll be happy you did.
HAPPY !!! and the only way to be that is not to live with In-laws!!!
DO NOT Do IT!
Never with the in laws. NEVER. Even if you have to live in a one room apartment live on your own.
What this old woman has to say about living with in-laws is not on you life if you have any other choice. I lived with my died husbands Mother for awhile and it was okay but if I had my way I would live in a big two or three room tent at a lake or in the desert. Good luck and best wishes.
Well it's upto you. Some of them are really friendly and caring while some can be cruel and can ruin your life. You know them, right? You decide if you can spend everyday with them and if you'll enjoy it.
This is from personal experience, please, please do not live with either your parents or his. It will be total disaster. If you do get along with either set, you won't after you start living with them. There will be an unbelievable amount of tension in the house. Tempers will fly, they will not be able to keep out of your business, they will want to tell you how to live, how to spend you money, where to work, when to work. It will be unbearable for you and your spouse. I had to live with my in-laws for a year and a half. I was miserable, I cried myself to sleep every night because my mother in law said mean horrible things to me. My husband wouldn't stand up to her. I finally told her off. I found a home up for auction and took my husband to see it and told him that we could buy it or we could divorce. We still live in that home 8 1/2 yrs later. This is testament to NOT LIVING WITH ANY INLAWS.
If you are old enough to get married, you are old enough to support yourselves and get your own place. If you weren't ready financially, maybe you should have waited...Well, I guess it is too late for that now, look for an affordable apartment and I do mean affordable...it won't be the best, but at least you will have each other.Time to grow up guys, mom and dad did their job, don't impose on them. Parents don't often say it, but they like their time alone after all the kids are grown and moved out. Time to go....
i have to say that i live with my fionce's parents right now and i'ts not a good idea - don't do it. save up and get a place of your own; his/her mom will drive you nuts. you can never be 'good enough' for thier child. don't do it.
NEVER EVER LIVE WITH YOUR IN-LAWS...YOU WILL END UP GETTING A DIVORCE!!!
That is an awful idea!
You gotta make it on your own, if that means doing it tough, so be it.
My sister is getting married soon and we would like to keep things in budget?
We don't want to have the lovebirds worry much over costs, so we (friends and family) help as much as we can. What are the best budget saving tips you can give? Appreciate the advice, thanks in advance.My sister is getting married soon and we would like to keep things in budget?
Keep to the buget and guest list first and foremost.
1: Make the invitations
2: Get married in a free or low cost place like a state park, recreational park
3: Get married either on a friday night or on a sunday
4: Have an early morning wedding followed by a light luncheon.
5: IF your going to use real flowers make sure they are ones that are in season, and inexpensive
6: Have a family member make the cake
7: Buy a digital camera and have someone take pictures (Be sure to buy and extra memory stick)
8: You could hire students to do the photography, food, and music.
I can't think of anything else right now. Good luck to your sister. :)My sister is getting married soon and we would like to keep things in budget?
make what you can yourselves like;
invitations, bouquets (get flowers at flower market, MUCH cheaper than paying a florist to make them), bonboniere, table decorations and place cards...
get lots of quotes on reception venues to compare, or opt for having a cocktail type reception in someones backyard or at a trendy cafe...
look for secondhand wedding dresses and bridal gowns/mens suits - usually they have only been worn once so not really 'second hand'
Once you have a budget, stick to it! Keep a list of everything purchased so you don't blow it out
Get married in the morning and then have a breakfast or brunch after the ceremony. Breakfast or brunch is ALWAYS the least expensive meal to serve plus you do not have to serve liquor except for a toast to the Bride and Groom.
Use sparkling cider or sparkling grape juice instead of champagne or sparkling wine.
Only have a Maid of Honor and a Best Man. Less bouquets and gifts to buy plus there is no argument about what to wear.
Have a ';dessert reception'; at 2PM or 3PM or after 7PM. Your guests have already eaten lunch or dinner.
A wedding reception should NOT look like a ';a Sunday night pot luck dinner.'; Even if you ask friends and family members to help prepare the food, all the bowls and platters should match, and nothing should be in plastic containers or in boxes or bags. Use real dishes and glassware. Even the simpliest meal looks better on real dishes!
Eliminate ';wedding day accessories.'; There is no need for a guest book and feather pen, table favors, a petal basket, a ring bearer's pillow or an expensive unity candle set.
Answered by: A Certified wedding specialist / A Professional bridal consultant / A Wedding ceremony officiant
check out things online! Ebay especially, you can get everything - invitions, veils, shoes, decorations, cake toppers, guest books/pens, cake server sets... Also look for a printer to make your invitations. Don't buy them online or through a company. Get onto your computer and design something nice, you can use clip art pictures or download images from the internet, but make something you like, then take it to a print shop. For my wedding I ordered 400 invitations/RSVP cards/map card/ and envelopes for $140. On line or through a company it would have been Thousands!! Make the programs for the ceremony the same way.
And check out your local grocery store bakery for the wedding cake, or even wal-mart. They make nice cakes for a lot less money than a private bakery.
Keep the wedding guest list very SHORT. That's the only way to keep things reasonable. Having inmediate family and close friends only it's the way to go, no need to invite evryone in town, get in debt and stress. Keep it simple and invite 30-40 people tops.
Good luck
arh wat gr8 fam and friends you are!!
like previous said make everthing yourself..even posies for bridesmaids,friend do photos and video..use a friends nice car,buffet in pm get everyone to bring something,find dress maker,hire suits.go on ';my vouchercodes.com';save loadz..
all the best..shes very lucky to hav u all xx
Hand make the invitations. Have a buffet rather than a sit down meal and friends and family make it. Ask around see if anyone is prepared to have a go at making the cake.
Here' an article with some good tips. http://discussweddings.blogspot.com/2008鈥?/a>
Have appetizers instead of a full meal for the reception. Have a fake cake made and serve sheet cake later. Have a DJ not a band.
Keep to the buget and guest list first and foremost.
1: Make the invitations
2: Get married in a free or low cost place like a state park, recreational park
3: Get married either on a friday night or on a sunday
4: Have an early morning wedding followed by a light luncheon.
5: IF your going to use real flowers make sure they are ones that are in season, and inexpensive
6: Have a family member make the cake
7: Buy a digital camera and have someone take pictures (Be sure to buy and extra memory stick)
8: You could hire students to do the photography, food, and music.
I can't think of anything else right now. Good luck to your sister. :)My sister is getting married soon and we would like to keep things in budget?
make what you can yourselves like;
invitations, bouquets (get flowers at flower market, MUCH cheaper than paying a florist to make them), bonboniere, table decorations and place cards...
get lots of quotes on reception venues to compare, or opt for having a cocktail type reception in someones backyard or at a trendy cafe...
look for secondhand wedding dresses and bridal gowns/mens suits - usually they have only been worn once so not really 'second hand'
Once you have a budget, stick to it! Keep a list of everything purchased so you don't blow it out
Get married in the morning and then have a breakfast or brunch after the ceremony. Breakfast or brunch is ALWAYS the least expensive meal to serve plus you do not have to serve liquor except for a toast to the Bride and Groom.
Use sparkling cider or sparkling grape juice instead of champagne or sparkling wine.
Only have a Maid of Honor and a Best Man. Less bouquets and gifts to buy plus there is no argument about what to wear.
Have a ';dessert reception'; at 2PM or 3PM or after 7PM. Your guests have already eaten lunch or dinner.
A wedding reception should NOT look like a ';a Sunday night pot luck dinner.'; Even if you ask friends and family members to help prepare the food, all the bowls and platters should match, and nothing should be in plastic containers or in boxes or bags. Use real dishes and glassware. Even the simpliest meal looks better on real dishes!
Eliminate ';wedding day accessories.'; There is no need for a guest book and feather pen, table favors, a petal basket, a ring bearer's pillow or an expensive unity candle set.
Answered by: A Certified wedding specialist / A Professional bridal consultant / A Wedding ceremony officiant
check out things online! Ebay especially, you can get everything - invitions, veils, shoes, decorations, cake toppers, guest books/pens, cake server sets... Also look for a printer to make your invitations. Don't buy them online or through a company. Get onto your computer and design something nice, you can use clip art pictures or download images from the internet, but make something you like, then take it to a print shop. For my wedding I ordered 400 invitations/RSVP cards/map card/ and envelopes for $140. On line or through a company it would have been Thousands!! Make the programs for the ceremony the same way.
And check out your local grocery store bakery for the wedding cake, or even wal-mart. They make nice cakes for a lot less money than a private bakery.
Keep the wedding guest list very SHORT. That's the only way to keep things reasonable. Having inmediate family and close friends only it's the way to go, no need to invite evryone in town, get in debt and stress. Keep it simple and invite 30-40 people tops.
Good luck
arh wat gr8 fam and friends you are!!
like previous said make everthing yourself..even posies for bridesmaids,friend do photos and video..use a friends nice car,buffet in pm get everyone to bring something,find dress maker,hire suits.go on ';my vouchercodes.com';save loadz..
all the best..shes very lucky to hav u all xx
Hand make the invitations. Have a buffet rather than a sit down meal and friends and family make it. Ask around see if anyone is prepared to have a go at making the cake.
Here' an article with some good tips. http://discussweddings.blogspot.com/2008鈥?/a>
Have appetizers instead of a full meal for the reception. Have a fake cake made and serve sheet cake later. Have a DJ not a band.
What are the biggest changes in a relationship once you get married?
There wasn't any for us, we got to know each other as friends first, we then dated, then moved in together. I wasn't big on marriage so it was my decision to not marry at the time. We grew closer and our secret is the friendship. We both have shared and separate interests. There is trust and we both have friends of both sexes. We married when we thought we wanted to start a family, nothing changed :)What are the biggest changes in a relationship once you get married?
You have to stop behaving like you are single; stop flirting with other people; stop spending time away from you spouse; stop being irresponsible.
You have to start to consciously loving each other; it will no longer come to you in compulsions.
In virtually everything you do, you can choose to either grow closer together or further apart. Keep choosing further apart and apart happens.What are the biggest changes in a relationship once you get married?
You realize that the image of marriage presented to you by your parents, friends or the media is more of a lie than it is real. The realness begins when the honeymoon period wears off and you see how different you and your spouse are. There is no question that you love them but it makes you wonder.
joint bank account (usually)
same last name (usually)
living in the same residence/sharing everything
commitment
more sex or lack of sex (depends)
Seriously, if you love someone enough, there shouldn't be any changes in a relationship - it should be just the same, happy, loving etc.
is this the poster AlexG? just asking because of your avatar.
the biggest change when you get married is....
being committed. it's not like being just boyfriend and girlfriend.
You begin to take each other for granted. Familiarity breeds contempt.
I guess it hits you then.
There shouldn't be any. The only way to prevent that is to take your time....
Your stuck with them unless you and her want to get a divorcelotion cream
You have to stop behaving like you are single; stop flirting with other people; stop spending time away from you spouse; stop being irresponsible.
You have to start to consciously loving each other; it will no longer come to you in compulsions.
In virtually everything you do, you can choose to either grow closer together or further apart. Keep choosing further apart and apart happens.What are the biggest changes in a relationship once you get married?
You realize that the image of marriage presented to you by your parents, friends or the media is more of a lie than it is real. The realness begins when the honeymoon period wears off and you see how different you and your spouse are. There is no question that you love them but it makes you wonder.
joint bank account (usually)
same last name (usually)
living in the same residence/sharing everything
commitment
more sex or lack of sex (depends)
Seriously, if you love someone enough, there shouldn't be any changes in a relationship - it should be just the same, happy, loving etc.
is this the poster AlexG? just asking because of your avatar.
the biggest change when you get married is....
being committed. it's not like being just boyfriend and girlfriend.
You begin to take each other for granted. Familiarity breeds contempt.
I guess it hits you then.
There shouldn't be any. The only way to prevent that is to take your time....
Your stuck with them unless you and her want to get a divorce
Why Japanese is not able to obtain a visa and stay with the person who lived in USA after they married?
When we talked with lawyers, they told us that it was illegal to stay in the USA and suggested us the first way to live together was the groom to be American citizen at first. I had departed from him and waited for him over two years. However, I couldn't receive any visa to stay with him, and so on.Why Japanese is not able to obtain a visa and stay with the person who lived in USA after they married?
Race has nothing to do with it. To stay in the US you need a spousal Visa which takes with the US Government 9-10 months on average. There would be an embassy interview likely in Tokyo. If you were in the US on another visa like a student or work visa if the proper things were filed in time you might hve been allowed to stay but its a delicate situation and if your current visa is about to expire it likely won't make a difference. If it was a tourist visa its hopeless to be allowed to stay as short term relationships or short stays with marriage and often seen as attempts to circumvent the laws and the system.
You can get a spousal visa which will require like I said an interview, financial records of husband, medical exam, and a few other things. If you screw up a few of the basics it could postpone it quite a long time.Why Japanese is not able to obtain a visa and stay with the person who lived in USA after they married?
We asked some likely lawyers in Korea because I heard from my groom they were immigrant lawyers but their certification was stated the degree for different filed with law. I heard other foreigner who held a green card, his partner could stay with him after marriage.
Therefore, it is sort of discrimination for races or people who don鈥檛 have much money. In general, after marriage, whatever their nationality they are, they are eligible to live together. It means they are eligible to receive any kinds of visa right away after their marriage.
If either partner has to be a student because of visa, they need other money. First of all, they want to spend money for living.
The US is anti-migrant, it has similar rules for pretty much everybody from pretty much any country.
They don't like smart foreigners from places such as Europe or Japan coming in and competing with natural born Americans, and they really hate poor foriegners coming in and competing with poor Americans. In fact they just plain hate foriegners coming in at all and competing with them.
In order to get a good visa one or both of the married couple should be a natural born American citizen and they should have been married for at least 5 years. Otherwise you get treated like an overstay risk.
One of the married couple must be an american citizen or born citizen
o_o where did you hear that?
it might not be true
Race has nothing to do with it. To stay in the US you need a spousal Visa which takes with the US Government 9-10 months on average. There would be an embassy interview likely in Tokyo. If you were in the US on another visa like a student or work visa if the proper things were filed in time you might hve been allowed to stay but its a delicate situation and if your current visa is about to expire it likely won't make a difference. If it was a tourist visa its hopeless to be allowed to stay as short term relationships or short stays with marriage and often seen as attempts to circumvent the laws and the system.
You can get a spousal visa which will require like I said an interview, financial records of husband, medical exam, and a few other things. If you screw up a few of the basics it could postpone it quite a long time.Why Japanese is not able to obtain a visa and stay with the person who lived in USA after they married?
We asked some likely lawyers in Korea because I heard from my groom they were immigrant lawyers but their certification was stated the degree for different filed with law. I heard other foreigner who held a green card, his partner could stay with him after marriage.
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Therefore, it is sort of discrimination for races or people who don鈥檛 have much money. In general, after marriage, whatever their nationality they are, they are eligible to live together. It means they are eligible to receive any kinds of visa right away after their marriage.
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If either partner has to be a student because of visa, they need other money. First of all, they want to spend money for living.
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The US is anti-migrant, it has similar rules for pretty much everybody from pretty much any country.
They don't like smart foreigners from places such as Europe or Japan coming in and competing with natural born Americans, and they really hate poor foriegners coming in and competing with poor Americans. In fact they just plain hate foriegners coming in at all and competing with them.
In order to get a good visa one or both of the married couple should be a natural born American citizen and they should have been married for at least 5 years. Otherwise you get treated like an overstay risk.
One of the married couple must be an american citizen or born citizen
o_o where did you hear that?
it might not be true
I dreamnt last night that me and an ex boyfriend got married?
What could this mean? Me and him are still friends now, Oh and no I wouldn't get back with him. EVER!I dreamnt last night that me and an ex boyfriend got married?
lol. It's just a dream. If you're not going to get back with him forever. Than it's forever. DOn't worry. I've had weird dreams b4I dreamnt last night that me and an ex boyfriend got married?
Is that good or bad? Maybe it means your going to met someone
special. Dreams always tell something If you see color details moving
lol. It's just a dream. If you're not going to get back with him forever. Than it's forever. DOn't worry. I've had weird dreams b4I dreamnt last night that me and an ex boyfriend got married?
Is that good or bad? Maybe it means your going to met someone
special. Dreams always tell something If you see color details moving
How long were you married until you started discussing the possibility of a menage?
(a 3sum)How long were you married until you started discussing the possibility of a menage?
i'm supposed to discuss that at some time in my marriage?
no wonder its going downhillHow long were you married until you started discussing the possibility of a menage?
You don't.
Hopefully, you committed yourselves to each other!
Sex isn't a game that you use to reward/punish each other with. If this sort of sexual misbehavior is ok with you and/or him, you two aren't ready to be married to each other.
I didn't. I just went ahead had one. Of course my husband wasn't involve but I told him about it later. He had already said it was OK to have sex with other men because he was out of town a lot.
we did that during the engagement.
i'm supposed to discuss that at some time in my marriage?
no wonder its going downhillHow long were you married until you started discussing the possibility of a menage?
You don't.
Hopefully, you committed yourselves to each other!
Sex isn't a game that you use to reward/punish each other with. If this sort of sexual misbehavior is ok with you and/or him, you two aren't ready to be married to each other.
I didn't. I just went ahead had one. Of course my husband wasn't involve but I told him about it later. He had already said it was OK to have sex with other men because he was out of town a lot.
we did that during the engagement.
Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?
Me and my boyfriend have been going out for 10 months now but we have known eachother a lot longer than that. Hes always talking abour getting married and what it would be like. And he really wants to but he wants to right away.
Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?
Why is this question in the mathematics section?
It depends. For most people it is too young. Are you ready for the responsibilities of marriage? Are you interested in settling down and forgoing the carefree days of being single? Are you able to support yourselves financially? Are you prepared for the emotion demands of marriage? Are you ready to put the needs of your spouse ahead of your own?
There are plenty of other questions you could ask as well.
p.s. Why would anyone get engaged if they are not ready for marriage as well?Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?
lol yes way to young
you will just end up getting hurt, and divored
and srsly only 10 MONTHS
thats not even a yearr
slow it down
i know i may be only 14
but thats way to young lol
if you truly believe you're in love then its not. just make sure that you are dead sure.
email me missmoto17@yahoo.com
my bf is 21 and i am 18 we are talking about it but hvae been dating for 4+ years
Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?
Why is this question in the mathematics section?
It depends. For most people it is too young. Are you ready for the responsibilities of marriage? Are you interested in settling down and forgoing the carefree days of being single? Are you able to support yourselves financially? Are you prepared for the emotion demands of marriage? Are you ready to put the needs of your spouse ahead of your own?
There are plenty of other questions you could ask as well.
p.s. Why would anyone get engaged if they are not ready for marriage as well?Do you think 18 and 19 is too young to get married or just engaged?
lol yes way to young
you will just end up getting hurt, and divored
and srsly only 10 MONTHS
thats not even a yearr
slow it down
i know i may be only 14
but thats way to young lol
if you truly believe you're in love then its not. just make sure that you are dead sure.
email me missmoto17@yahoo.com
my bf is 21 and i am 18 we are talking about it but hvae been dating for 4+ years
Where would you get married in Arkansas?
Eureka Springs or Hot Springs?
Just the two of us for 3-4 days in Jan or Feb. Into hiking and history.Where would you get married in Arkansas?
HOT SPRINGS!!!! there is the most beautiful chapel called the Anthony Chapel!!! thats where im getting married!!! so romantic! Check it out here,,, http://www.garvangardens.org/discover/an鈥?/a>
Good Luck finding your special place!Where would you get married in Arkansas?
Somewhere else if you're going to be there.
According to your name, I would not like the smell.
Just the two of us for 3-4 days in Jan or Feb. Into hiking and history.Where would you get married in Arkansas?
HOT SPRINGS!!!! there is the most beautiful chapel called the Anthony Chapel!!! thats where im getting married!!! so romantic! Check it out here,,, http://www.garvangardens.org/discover/an鈥?/a>
Good Luck finding your special place!Where would you get married in Arkansas?
Somewhere else if you're going to be there.
According to your name, I would not like the smell.
Can a sim on the sims 3 with commitment issues get married?
I'm wondering how far the 'commitment issues' go.Can a sim on the sims 3 with commitment issues get married?
I created a sim that lived by himself, and after establishing my sim in the ';town'; my sim met a girl that just happened to have commitment issues. : (
I worked hard but was able to go steady, and then worked even harder to become engaged...
I figured out that for any sim you need to go over ';flirty';, then past ';alluring'; to ';extremely irresistible';. But for our commitment issued sims they not only need to be at ';extremely irresistible'; but the green bar needs to be filled quite high.
(Add Note) I was able to have my sim marry and now they are a new happy couple. : )
Personal Tips:
1. Flirt as much as you can as quickly as you can.
2. Always save before attempting to ask ';The Questions'; to Commitment issued sims.lotion cream
I created a sim that lived by himself, and after establishing my sim in the ';town'; my sim met a girl that just happened to have commitment issues. : (
I worked hard but was able to go steady, and then worked even harder to become engaged...
I figured out that for any sim you need to go over ';flirty';, then past ';alluring'; to ';extremely irresistible';. But for our commitment issued sims they not only need to be at ';extremely irresistible'; but the green bar needs to be filled quite high.
(Add Note) I was able to have my sim marry and now they are a new happy couple. : )
Personal Tips:
1. Flirt as much as you can as quickly as you can.
2. Always save before attempting to ask ';The Questions'; to Commitment issued sims.
What kind of person would turn their back on the church they attended for 18 years and was even married there?
Would you abandon your church because of public pressure or would to stand up for the church you attended for 18 years no matter what?What kind of person would turn their back on the church they attended for 18 years and was even married there?
I would and I did. They took a nasty anti-gay stance, and I told them to go to hell.What kind of person would turn their back on the church they attended for 18 years and was even married there?
Such an intensely personal decision would have to rest on discussion with our entire family. None of us stand up for something ';no matter what.'; There are always circumstances that change and truth that comes to light. Do I think that Obama knew the extent of Wright's idealogy? Yes. Do I think that Obama can think for himself and didn't adopt Wright's ideas as his own? Yes. Perhaps he and his campaign managers weighed the furor his membership was causing, and the way Wright was responding publicly, and the good he could do this country if he resigned membership and decided it was what he must do. I don't think less of him for it. He wasn't against the church itself, just got tangled up with Wright and all that fallout. I don't ever remember Obama bad mouthing the church itself.
A lot of people have recently left their churches of long standing because of differences on social issues/theological issues.
When a church, for example, ordains women into the clergy, a lot of the more conservative members have left (some had attended for many more than 18 years!!. Or if their churches admitted gay members or perform gay marriages...
Sometimes not only members but whole congregations have left to found new churches...So do not single out Obama. You right wing nuts have walked out on your churches too.
According to his own book, Obama began attending that church as a means of making political and community contacts in the neighborhood.
He left the church under political pressure and threw the pastor under the bus in order to get elected.
Based on the beginning and end of his time at the church, one would have to wonder what his commitment and convictions were.
A person who moved away from that community. It would be a pretty long drive every Sunday. Both of Obama's parents were atheists, so he probably didn't have too much religious identity until he decided to go into politics. We all know that religion is very important to a new politician. It is not easy to get elected in the US without saying that you believe in a higher being. This too will change in time. Thomas Jefferson hoped that in his time, but it still have not happened here yet.
';And the day will come when the mystical generation of Jesus, by the supreme being as his father in the womb of a virgin will be classed with the fable of the generation of Minerve in the brain of Jupiter. But may we hope that the dawn of reason and freedom of thought in these United States will do away with this artificial scaffolding, and restore to us the primitive and genuine doctrines of this most venerated reformer of human errors.
-Thomas Jefferson, Letter to John Adams, April 11, 1823';
Someone that needs to distance themselves politically from an angry racist congregation.
I don't believe he changed his beliefs, just his address.
@Lord Vader
Admirable to stick up for your beliefs. But that isn't the same thing. Did you stay at that church for 18 years, listening to anti-gay rants, and then leave the church and pretend you just never knew they were anti-gay?
Hitler!
HITLER WAS CHARMING AND VERY LIKABLE AND CHARISMATIC LIKE OBAMA. THAT IS HOW HITLER MESMERIZED AN ENTIRE NATION. MANY SEE IT IN HUSSEIN OBAMA, I DON鈥橳! OBAMA WOULD STILL ABSOLUTELY DECEIVE THE LYNCH MOB.
THE COMMUNIST PARTY USA SEEMS TO BE THRILLED WITH OBAMA'S WIN. IT CALLS OBAMA'S ELECTION AS A VICTORY FOR THE ';WORKING CLASS'; AND CALLED ON THE PRESIDENT-ELECT TO CARRY OUT HIS PROMISES, INCLUDING HIS NOTED COMMITMENT TO ';SPREAD THE WEALTH.'; ANY QUESTIONS?
';The Democrats sued me [Tom Delay] for being a resident of Texas. That's just like asking me for my birth certificate.';
ron: i'd rather he be agnostic than racist. at least then we'd be on the same page about SOMEthing.
well, he wanted to be president...the fire was being lit under his feet and he had no choice...abandon his church or abandon his political ambitions. apparently people will worship him no matter what though...
Some churches are full of emotional and spiritual hog wash. They are nothing more than political venues for unconverted leadership. They are not doctrinally sound. If I was born into such a church (which I was), I would definitely laud any one who changed to a better church (which I did).
I left a Church I attended for 26 years. They had changed from what they originally was. From a caring non-profit to a self serving business for profit enterprise. They ended up closing forever after that.
I would never abandon my church since I believe in it. If a person truly believes in something, public pressure shouldn't stop them. Obama is a woos
I would abandon it in a heartbeat if it was doing what I did not like, this is america, I am young and we dont take stuff from people anymore, so they would be bye bye, see yall lata.
The kind of person who thinks for themselves, and has come to the realization that they disagree with the church's teachings.
He joined that church for political reasons because it glides through on tax-free status under the guise of Christianity. He doesn't care one way or the other because he's a closet Muslim.
Because he wanted to LIE to Americans to get their votes.
President Barrack Insane Obama.
DTG
Someone who prefers to hide who he really is from the public.
I could no more turn my back on my pastor than I could turn my back on the entire white community.
Edit: Boy, that sure sounds racist doesn't it? But I'm sure that I've heard somewhere before...
Who are we talking about here? Maybe president Wright-Ayers. He might have gotten tired of what the preacher saying but from what I understand he didn't hear a thing. Either way I'm confused now.
A political Narcissistic snake in the grass.
I wouldn't have joined the church in the first place as it is extremely racist.
Only HE has said he abandoned it
An infidel.
I would never attend a racist church in the first place!
Roman Catholic Glenn Beck when he converted to Mormonism?
a person that thinks you're REALLY stupid and will fall for his socialist policies
But Lil Obama said he never heard a word. Man,he's got some kick a** drugs.
I would and I did. They took a nasty anti-gay stance, and I told them to go to hell.What kind of person would turn their back on the church they attended for 18 years and was even married there?
Such an intensely personal decision would have to rest on discussion with our entire family. None of us stand up for something ';no matter what.'; There are always circumstances that change and truth that comes to light. Do I think that Obama knew the extent of Wright's idealogy? Yes. Do I think that Obama can think for himself and didn't adopt Wright's ideas as his own? Yes. Perhaps he and his campaign managers weighed the furor his membership was causing, and the way Wright was responding publicly, and the good he could do this country if he resigned membership and decided it was what he must do. I don't think less of him for it. He wasn't against the church itself, just got tangled up with Wright and all that fallout. I don't ever remember Obama bad mouthing the church itself.
A lot of people have recently left their churches of long standing because of differences on social issues/theological issues.
When a church, for example, ordains women into the clergy, a lot of the more conservative members have left (some had attended for many more than 18 years!!. Or if their churches admitted gay members or perform gay marriages...
Sometimes not only members but whole congregations have left to found new churches...So do not single out Obama. You right wing nuts have walked out on your churches too.
According to his own book, Obama began attending that church as a means of making political and community contacts in the neighborhood.
He left the church under political pressure and threw the pastor under the bus in order to get elected.
Based on the beginning and end of his time at the church, one would have to wonder what his commitment and convictions were.
A person who moved away from that community. It would be a pretty long drive every Sunday. Both of Obama's parents were atheists, so he probably didn't have too much religious identity until he decided to go into politics. We all know that religion is very important to a new politician. It is not easy to get elected in the US without saying that you believe in a higher being. This too will change in time. Thomas Jefferson hoped that in his time, but it still have not happened here yet.
';And the day will come when the mystical generation of Jesus, by the supreme being as his father in the womb of a virgin will be classed with the fable of the generation of Minerve in the brain of Jupiter. But may we hope that the dawn of reason and freedom of thought in these United States will do away with this artificial scaffolding, and restore to us the primitive and genuine doctrines of this most venerated reformer of human errors.
-Thomas Jefferson, Letter to John Adams, April 11, 1823';
Someone that needs to distance themselves politically from an angry racist congregation.
I don't believe he changed his beliefs, just his address.
@Lord Vader
Admirable to stick up for your beliefs. But that isn't the same thing. Did you stay at that church for 18 years, listening to anti-gay rants, and then leave the church and pretend you just never knew they were anti-gay?
Hitler!
HITLER WAS CHARMING AND VERY LIKABLE AND CHARISMATIC LIKE OBAMA. THAT IS HOW HITLER MESMERIZED AN ENTIRE NATION. MANY SEE IT IN HUSSEIN OBAMA, I DON鈥橳! OBAMA WOULD STILL ABSOLUTELY DECEIVE THE LYNCH MOB.
THE COMMUNIST PARTY USA SEEMS TO BE THRILLED WITH OBAMA'S WIN. IT CALLS OBAMA'S ELECTION AS A VICTORY FOR THE ';WORKING CLASS'; AND CALLED ON THE PRESIDENT-ELECT TO CARRY OUT HIS PROMISES, INCLUDING HIS NOTED COMMITMENT TO ';SPREAD THE WEALTH.'; ANY QUESTIONS?
';The Democrats sued me [Tom Delay] for being a resident of Texas. That's just like asking me for my birth certificate.';
ron: i'd rather he be agnostic than racist. at least then we'd be on the same page about SOMEthing.
well, he wanted to be president...the fire was being lit under his feet and he had no choice...abandon his church or abandon his political ambitions. apparently people will worship him no matter what though...
Some churches are full of emotional and spiritual hog wash. They are nothing more than political venues for unconverted leadership. They are not doctrinally sound. If I was born into such a church (which I was), I would definitely laud any one who changed to a better church (which I did).
I left a Church I attended for 26 years. They had changed from what they originally was. From a caring non-profit to a self serving business for profit enterprise. They ended up closing forever after that.
I would never abandon my church since I believe in it. If a person truly believes in something, public pressure shouldn't stop them. Obama is a woos
I would abandon it in a heartbeat if it was doing what I did not like, this is america, I am young and we dont take stuff from people anymore, so they would be bye bye, see yall lata.
The kind of person who thinks for themselves, and has come to the realization that they disagree with the church's teachings.
He joined that church for political reasons because it glides through on tax-free status under the guise of Christianity. He doesn't care one way or the other because he's a closet Muslim.
Because he wanted to LIE to Americans to get their votes.
President Barrack Insane Obama.
DTG
Someone who prefers to hide who he really is from the public.
I could no more turn my back on my pastor than I could turn my back on the entire white community.
Edit: Boy, that sure sounds racist doesn't it? But I'm sure that I've heard somewhere before...
Who are we talking about here? Maybe president Wright-Ayers. He might have gotten tired of what the preacher saying but from what I understand he didn't hear a thing. Either way I'm confused now.
A political Narcissistic snake in the grass.
I wouldn't have joined the church in the first place as it is extremely racist.
Only HE has said he abandoned it
An infidel.
I would never attend a racist church in the first place!
Roman Catholic Glenn Beck when he converted to Mormonism?
a person that thinks you're REALLY stupid and will fall for his socialist policies
But Lil Obama said he never heard a word. Man,he's got some kick a** drugs.
What can I do, OR how to protect MY future BEFORE letting my girlfriend a make a baby or getting married?
I don't want to send allimony while she takes off with it, or be stuck in an unbearable family situationWhat can I do, OR how to protect MY future BEFORE letting my girlfriend a make a baby or getting married?
I don't know where in this situation you are in, but don't sleep around and use condoms if you want to minimise your chance of unwanted pregnancies.
Have a pre-nuptial agreement before marriage.
Choose wisely.
Or avoid it entirely.
HarrietWhat can I do, OR how to protect MY future BEFORE letting my girlfriend a make a baby or getting married?
simple
NEVER marry
there is no benefit in it for you
if you acquire wealth and assets
while she is married to you
she is entitled to 50% in most states where community property is law
look at all those mega divorces from guys like Micheal Jordan and so on, and the record amounts of money they had to pay out plus alimony...
why people with wealth marry is beyond me
the only person who is smart is Gene Simmons ( of KISS fame )
he has never married his Playboy Playmate of 21 years
he has a mansion in LA, CA, he has 2 kids with her.. she benefits from the nice lifestyle they leads, he buys her things, but if she ever cheated, she would get nothing, zip nada.. except anything he bought her in her name.. he is smarter than most high profile celebrities and atheletes
in any no fault state
a women cam marry you, bear you children, cheat, file for divorce
and since it would be a no fault divorce, can just say irreconcialible differences as the reason for divorce ( since you cannot use cheating as fault ), then take 50% of all your assets, your pension and a huge cost of living support for life ( in CA if over 10 year marriage ) plus child support based on income of the husband
Johnny Carson had legendary alimony payments to his ex for years, and every so often she would go back to court ot argue ( and get ) increases in her 30,000 dollar a month alimony support, claiming she just couldn't live on such an income based on her lifestyle
keep in mind if you have a Gf and have kids and then break up
you're still on the hook for child support, no matter what
but at least you do not have to pay some women who is lazy and does not want to wok , alimony.. women see alimony as entitlements ( think welfare ) hence why they choose their targets carefully to maximize the payout.
you best bet would be to put assets in a trust, buy a home, set in a trust, and then rent the home from the trust, form a LLC and take a small salary from the LLC, but drive companies cars..
therefore should a GF ever take you to court for child support, it will be based on income, and the lesser the income, the better. Just never let her know that you only earn 12k at your LLC , and have no assets ( remember all the assets, cars and such are either the LLC's assets or in a trust )
first of all... you sound extremely unsure as to whether or not you even want this. If you don't... don't do it. You owe no one anything except for yourself. Tell her you're not ready, even if you are you want to be ';settled'; first and apparently you're not. Take your time... there's no hurry for things like that. If she can't understand that then maybe she's not the one. think long and hard about it.
You can start by using condoms, so you won't have unwanted births. As for getting married you should make sure U have lots of money in the bank; that's my opinion.
Keep it in your pants until your married if you don't want to make a baby. Nothing is foolproof.
I'm confused. Is she pregnant. If not, use a condom every time. It's 98% effective when used properly and tell her to get on birth control. Sex ed anyone
I'm confused. Is she pregnant? Is the kid out? I say masturbate at least twice a week.
This makes no sense? obviously you don't really love your gf, just dump her! Or wrap it up!
don't get married and have kids.
I don't know where in this situation you are in, but don't sleep around and use condoms if you want to minimise your chance of unwanted pregnancies.
Have a pre-nuptial agreement before marriage.
Choose wisely.
Or avoid it entirely.
HarrietWhat can I do, OR how to protect MY future BEFORE letting my girlfriend a make a baby or getting married?
simple
NEVER marry
there is no benefit in it for you
if you acquire wealth and assets
while she is married to you
she is entitled to 50% in most states where community property is law
look at all those mega divorces from guys like Micheal Jordan and so on, and the record amounts of money they had to pay out plus alimony...
why people with wealth marry is beyond me
the only person who is smart is Gene Simmons ( of KISS fame )
he has never married his Playboy Playmate of 21 years
he has a mansion in LA, CA, he has 2 kids with her.. she benefits from the nice lifestyle they leads, he buys her things, but if she ever cheated, she would get nothing, zip nada.. except anything he bought her in her name.. he is smarter than most high profile celebrities and atheletes
in any no fault state
a women cam marry you, bear you children, cheat, file for divorce
and since it would be a no fault divorce, can just say irreconcialible differences as the reason for divorce ( since you cannot use cheating as fault ), then take 50% of all your assets, your pension and a huge cost of living support for life ( in CA if over 10 year marriage ) plus child support based on income of the husband
Johnny Carson had legendary alimony payments to his ex for years, and every so often she would go back to court ot argue ( and get ) increases in her 30,000 dollar a month alimony support, claiming she just couldn't live on such an income based on her lifestyle
keep in mind if you have a Gf and have kids and then break up
you're still on the hook for child support, no matter what
but at least you do not have to pay some women who is lazy and does not want to wok , alimony.. women see alimony as entitlements ( think welfare ) hence why they choose their targets carefully to maximize the payout.
you best bet would be to put assets in a trust, buy a home, set in a trust, and then rent the home from the trust, form a LLC and take a small salary from the LLC, but drive companies cars..
therefore should a GF ever take you to court for child support, it will be based on income, and the lesser the income, the better. Just never let her know that you only earn 12k at your LLC , and have no assets ( remember all the assets, cars and such are either the LLC's assets or in a trust )
first of all... you sound extremely unsure as to whether or not you even want this. If you don't... don't do it. You owe no one anything except for yourself. Tell her you're not ready, even if you are you want to be ';settled'; first and apparently you're not. Take your time... there's no hurry for things like that. If she can't understand that then maybe she's not the one. think long and hard about it.
You can start by using condoms, so you won't have unwanted births. As for getting married you should make sure U have lots of money in the bank; that's my opinion.
Keep it in your pants until your married if you don't want to make a baby. Nothing is foolproof.
I'm confused. Is she pregnant. If not, use a condom every time. It's 98% effective when used properly and tell her to get on birth control. Sex ed anyone
I'm confused. Is she pregnant? Is the kid out? I say masturbate at least twice a week.
This makes no sense? obviously you don't really love your gf, just dump her! Or wrap it up!
don't get married and have kids.
Would you still get married in a church if you both were agnostic?
And would your wedding dress still be special?Would you still get married in a church if you both were agnostic?
The dress is moot and has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with your beliefs or lackthereof. I don't really get why you would marry in a church if you don't believe what the church teaches. All you would be doing is having a pretty backdrop to please family which is not what a church is for. Why not get married somewhere that has special meaning to you or that you both like? Would you still get married in a church if you both were agnostic?
I dont see why any one who was agnostic would want to be married in a church because marriage in a church is an affirmation by God of your marriage. Also in my church a couple has to talk to the preacher before the wedding to make sure they beleve in their God and are willing to follow him in their marriage. I know of no Christian priest or preacher who would marry a couple in a church otherwise.
No, because it is disrespectful to the church since the two getting married do not share the beliefs of the church. I think it's also disrespectful to the couple getting married because their ceremony is not going to be meaningful to them.
As for the dress, it'll be special to the bride if that's the type of person she is. I am not very sentimental so my wedding dress is not that special to me.
Yes. Just because someone is agnostic does NOT mean that they don't believe in God. It would be ok to get married in a non-denominational church. Being agnostic just means that you can't PROVE that there's a God, which is why you don't know whether he exists or not. Also, the wedding dress isn't fully religious.... someone who isn't religious CAN have some of the sames values as a religious person (ie, purity).
My fianc茅's an atheistic satanist and I'm what I call a ';natural spiritualist'; because I kind of just have my own beliefs that don't go with anything else.
We're having the big Christian wedding for our families. I have to just recognize--the day isn't about me. It's about making everyone else happy. The rest of my life is about me and him being together.
And I'd rather not be wearing the dress!
No I would not get married at a church if I was agnostic. Do you think Catholics should get married in a Mosque? Seems hypocritical. Would the wedding dress be special, of course. That has little to do with religious beliefs though it is commonly thought to.
Only at a Unitarian Universalist church. They're the only church I'm aware of that doesn't try to tell you what to believe in as far as God's existence, but leaves it up to the individual themselves.
We both are, but we joined and are active in a Unitarian Universalist congregation, so we did get married their. I got married in a scarlet couture wedding dress.
hello in the first place i like don't think you can like find a church to marry if either one of you isnt like a member of a church or a christian?
Maybe...if it was important to the families or you wanted to be traditional or some such.
And of course the dress would still be special. Your religion has nothing to do with the dress.
I don't think I can get married in a church. I was never christened. Maybe I'd get married on a beach.
Yes, it would be super beautiful.
The dress is moot and has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with your beliefs or lackthereof. I don't really get why you would marry in a church if you don't believe what the church teaches. All you would be doing is having a pretty backdrop to please family which is not what a church is for. Why not get married somewhere that has special meaning to you or that you both like? Would you still get married in a church if you both were agnostic?
I dont see why any one who was agnostic would want to be married in a church because marriage in a church is an affirmation by God of your marriage. Also in my church a couple has to talk to the preacher before the wedding to make sure they beleve in their God and are willing to follow him in their marriage. I know of no Christian priest or preacher who would marry a couple in a church otherwise.
No, because it is disrespectful to the church since the two getting married do not share the beliefs of the church. I think it's also disrespectful to the couple getting married because their ceremony is not going to be meaningful to them.
As for the dress, it'll be special to the bride if that's the type of person she is. I am not very sentimental so my wedding dress is not that special to me.
Yes. Just because someone is agnostic does NOT mean that they don't believe in God. It would be ok to get married in a non-denominational church. Being agnostic just means that you can't PROVE that there's a God, which is why you don't know whether he exists or not. Also, the wedding dress isn't fully religious.... someone who isn't religious CAN have some of the sames values as a religious person (ie, purity).
My fianc茅's an atheistic satanist and I'm what I call a ';natural spiritualist'; because I kind of just have my own beliefs that don't go with anything else.
We're having the big Christian wedding for our families. I have to just recognize--the day isn't about me. It's about making everyone else happy. The rest of my life is about me and him being together.
And I'd rather not be wearing the dress!
No I would not get married at a church if I was agnostic. Do you think Catholics should get married in a Mosque? Seems hypocritical. Would the wedding dress be special, of course. That has little to do with religious beliefs though it is commonly thought to.
Only at a Unitarian Universalist church. They're the only church I'm aware of that doesn't try to tell you what to believe in as far as God's existence, but leaves it up to the individual themselves.
We both are, but we joined and are active in a Unitarian Universalist congregation, so we did get married their. I got married in a scarlet couture wedding dress.
hello in the first place i like don't think you can like find a church to marry if either one of you isnt like a member of a church or a christian?
Maybe...if it was important to the families or you wanted to be traditional or some such.
And of course the dress would still be special. Your religion has nothing to do with the dress.
I don't think I can get married in a church. I was never christened. Maybe I'd get married on a beach.
Yes, it would be super beautiful.
What is the law in Australia if you have paid off your own home and then find someone and get married .?
Is it legally all mine if my marriage breaksdown?are prenups really legally binding?What is the law in Australia if you have paid off your own home and then find someone and get married .?
Yes sign a prenup - You may get your house back but if you have kids the person who will be living with the children the majority of the time may be entitled to more of your money than otherwiseWhat is the law in Australia if you have paid off your own home and then find someone and get married .?
If it's the ';matrimonial home'; - a house you regularly live together in - then it's different from other property. Even if it was entirely yours before the marriage, your spouse becomes a joint tenant - they legally own part of it.
Prenups are legally binding. Take note, though, that contracts can be overturned if they're found to be unconscionable - the other person has to fully understand and appreciate what they're agreeing to, and they have to do so free of duress. A drastic difference in bargaining power might contribute to unconscionability.
Yes sign a prenup - You may get your house back but if you have kids the person who will be living with the children the majority of the time may be entitled to more of your money than otherwiseWhat is the law in Australia if you have paid off your own home and then find someone and get married .?
If it's the ';matrimonial home'; - a house you regularly live together in - then it's different from other property. Even if it was entirely yours before the marriage, your spouse becomes a joint tenant - they legally own part of it.
Prenups are legally binding. Take note, though, that contracts can be overturned if they're found to be unconscionable - the other person has to fully understand and appreciate what they're agreeing to, and they have to do so free of duress. A drastic difference in bargaining power might contribute to unconscionability.
Who out there is married and there husband works and you stay at home?
Do you get bored or stay busy? I stay at home and I don't have kids but I stay busy most of the time. I clean all the time and cook for him. Thanks for or opinion!!!!Who out there is married and there husband works and you stay at home?
Not me now days women who stay home especially who don't have kids have the reputation of being cheaters.Who out there is married and there husband works and you stay at home?
Used to be, during first marriage when my kids were small, by choice because I didnt want to put them into daycare and pay somebody else to raise my kids. Then when they were both in school, I did volunteer work for 2 years, as training to get back into the workforce and to help the community. Then for 8 business partners with my husband (now ex husband) (and his trade, not mine) from purpose built workshop in our backyard. So I had the best of both worlds, working with husband, getting paid, but still being available for my kids, and had my own routine of juggling housework, shopping, kids, work, going to the gym, socialising, all part of a regular day. But.. as the marriage crumbled, I went back to college to seek my own career and for past 6 years have been working full-time in a professional career of my own choice. Luckily for me, I was financially independent when we divorced.
But... as much as I love my independence, somedays I just cant be bothered driving through the peak hour traffic and working long days, and yeah, I wish (if the finances allowed) I could stay at home, sleep in, potter around the house, or do whatever I wanted. Now the only time I have to do the things I want is on the weekends, which go by so quickly that I'm back at work on Monday morning before I know it.
My first husband and I did this. I think it's up to your own comfort level, but in the name of mental health, get involved volunteering somewhere or do something where you get out of the house.
You can not sit there focused on cooking and cleaning all the time. IT's also bad for your relatoinship because your world is him. IT's unhealthy to do that to such an extent for years and years. The dependency factor would likely become huge.
Besides at some point you may need to return to work and if you are out of circulation for too long, that will make it harder.
I've been married for 22 years. For the first 5years, I worked and he finished his college degrees and then got a good job. Then we had children and I have been home since. I devoted my time to my husband and kids, but managed to keep current in my field from home.
Now, my kids are teens. I am basically still home. As they have grown, I have worked in my field more and more - part of the time away from home, but mostly I work at home. I have managed to work around my husbands and children's schedules.
I am ALWAYS busy, never bored, and do take time to relax when I need a break. I cook some (kids are old enough to pitch in and husband cooks some as well) and keep the house pretty well (kids and husband help some there as well). I manage the finances and bills as well as everyone's schedules and he cares for the yard, home repairs, and vehicles. We have it split up pretty well - it works for us.
I've had a full time career and have stayed home with children and staying at home with children is way more work than a full time job.
yes, i stay at home. i did before we had kids too because he works away. gone two weeks and home a week. so by me being at home. when he came home we could spend optimal time together. I stay very busy now due to having two kids. a 9 month old baby girl and a 2 and a half year old boy, with dev. delays and possible autisim. to be honest, staying home those years prior to kids, was the biggest mistake of my life. i sacrificed everything for him. and do you know where it got me? it got me in a very bad situation to where now, i cannot seem to get out of. try to make some money for yourself, even if it is baking cakes and selling them at the farmers market and keep it in an account just for you. so that way if you find yourself in my situation you wont feel trapped like i do. take care.
me...I'm a retired baker with all four kids all grown up....recently remarried and the new hubby wants to work until age 68 so he's got ten years yet to go before he retires....
I stay very busy....I'm an old domestic by heart so I clean, do laundry, bake %26amp; cook from scratch, do inside projects like paint woodwork, cabinets, walls.....do flower gardening out on our large deck %26amp; the small patch of yard in front of our detached condo (cottage).
We have one bossy indoor tuxedo cat %26amp; a black %26amp; white papillon dog that I care for daily.
Besides, sometimes my PsA flares (a form of arthritis) and when that happens, being home is a godsend as it often attacks my ankles %26amp; my hands/wrists-plus my former job has left me with hip %26amp; shoulder bursitis, and aggravated the arthritis in my lower spine which can inhibit movement and can be quite painful.
I work full time, but sometimes I think I would just love the luxury of staying home. I think at first I would keep very busy cleaning, volunteering, etc... but after a few weeks I would probably lose motivation and begin to put things off thinking I can do that anytime.... So eventually I would be bored. But I envy you.
i stay at home but i have 3 kids. i clean, garden, cook and go to gym every day. i am busy but quite bored - i am actually a career woman. so i do not want to get just any job for the sake of going to work, i want smth decent and powerful but cos i have been stay at home loser woman and lost my time this ain't gonna happen. well, at least i got my university education so i do not feel like a complete loser. and gym keeps my bu''tt firm and perky which makes my husband to want to provide for me
I volunteer at one of our large nursing homes every so often. I don't do it for the money but I do it because it makes me feel good. I'll be taking my state exam for CNA on Monday and my hope is to actually work there as a CNA. The residents I come in contact with are wonderful, and they would like for me to be there on a full-time basis. Other than that, my husband's got a job as an EMT (absolutely LOVES it), and wants to challenge the board as a Paramedic. He was already trained as a Paramedic in the National Guard and he doesn't want to go to school and relearn it if he was trained less than a year ago.
For right now, my main focus is to study for my state exam, and taking care of the kids. I just so happen to be on a break right now. I also do chores around the house, and so on. I'm actually pretty busy altogether..I never get bored :)
I do, and I am very busy. I take 9 - 12 credit hours every semester, plus do all the housework and cooking, plus take care of our 2 kids (home in the summer, volunteer at the school during the year), and take care of our 2 dogs and 2 cats. Plus I volunteer at an animal rescue.
Working my own money gives me a high so I work part-time and balance three kids and online school. I still clean and make dinner for my family, take them to after school stuff, help with homework etc. This makes me happy.
Enjoy your freedom before the kids come, get out and do more-make yourself happy.
My husband does work and I stay at home too. I have a laptop so that keeps me busy and I am going to school in 2 weeks for nursing degree. Maybe you can join a book club or volunteer for boy's and girl's club. I also help my husband with his business too.
I am overly busy. We both are. With three kids and I homeschool, and being a neat freak I am always going, going, going. I love it though. How lucky are we to be taken care of?!?
No boredom here. I come up with zillions of little plans and ideas that are ever changing and keeping me interested.
I did that for a little while - my fist husband didn't want me to work - but I really missed socializing - I spent my whole time looking for jobs and couldn't wait to get out. I can only cook and clean so much.
yep my hubby's a otr driver,so I stay home,we have 3 kids,and I love it.Find your self a hobby or volunteer in your community,
Well, I have children so I don't get bored but I do get resentful. He gets to leave, have a break and I have to be at home.
I take care of the kids, clean and cook. I do get bored and try to bust out of the joint on weekends.
I am a stay at home wife/mother. I do get bored at times but I also take college classes online and I do get out with my friends at least once a week.
yes, please tell me so I can get my husband a job there and we can afford for me to stay home, too.
I have a lot of female friends who are stay at home wives, really good friends we are.
If you don't have kids or a very severe illness, why is he keeping you at home?
Not me now days women who stay home especially who don't have kids have the reputation of being cheaters.Who out there is married and there husband works and you stay at home?
Used to be, during first marriage when my kids were small, by choice because I didnt want to put them into daycare and pay somebody else to raise my kids. Then when they were both in school, I did volunteer work for 2 years, as training to get back into the workforce and to help the community. Then for 8 business partners with my husband (now ex husband) (and his trade, not mine) from purpose built workshop in our backyard. So I had the best of both worlds, working with husband, getting paid, but still being available for my kids, and had my own routine of juggling housework, shopping, kids, work, going to the gym, socialising, all part of a regular day. But.. as the marriage crumbled, I went back to college to seek my own career and for past 6 years have been working full-time in a professional career of my own choice. Luckily for me, I was financially independent when we divorced.
But... as much as I love my independence, somedays I just cant be bothered driving through the peak hour traffic and working long days, and yeah, I wish (if the finances allowed) I could stay at home, sleep in, potter around the house, or do whatever I wanted. Now the only time I have to do the things I want is on the weekends, which go by so quickly that I'm back at work on Monday morning before I know it.
My first husband and I did this. I think it's up to your own comfort level, but in the name of mental health, get involved volunteering somewhere or do something where you get out of the house.
You can not sit there focused on cooking and cleaning all the time. IT's also bad for your relatoinship because your world is him. IT's unhealthy to do that to such an extent for years and years. The dependency factor would likely become huge.
Besides at some point you may need to return to work and if you are out of circulation for too long, that will make it harder.
I've been married for 22 years. For the first 5years, I worked and he finished his college degrees and then got a good job. Then we had children and I have been home since. I devoted my time to my husband and kids, but managed to keep current in my field from home.
Now, my kids are teens. I am basically still home. As they have grown, I have worked in my field more and more - part of the time away from home, but mostly I work at home. I have managed to work around my husbands and children's schedules.
I am ALWAYS busy, never bored, and do take time to relax when I need a break. I cook some (kids are old enough to pitch in and husband cooks some as well) and keep the house pretty well (kids and husband help some there as well). I manage the finances and bills as well as everyone's schedules and he cares for the yard, home repairs, and vehicles. We have it split up pretty well - it works for us.
I've had a full time career and have stayed home with children and staying at home with children is way more work than a full time job.
yes, i stay at home. i did before we had kids too because he works away. gone two weeks and home a week. so by me being at home. when he came home we could spend optimal time together. I stay very busy now due to having two kids. a 9 month old baby girl and a 2 and a half year old boy, with dev. delays and possible autisim. to be honest, staying home those years prior to kids, was the biggest mistake of my life. i sacrificed everything for him. and do you know where it got me? it got me in a very bad situation to where now, i cannot seem to get out of. try to make some money for yourself, even if it is baking cakes and selling them at the farmers market and keep it in an account just for you. so that way if you find yourself in my situation you wont feel trapped like i do. take care.
me...I'm a retired baker with all four kids all grown up....recently remarried and the new hubby wants to work until age 68 so he's got ten years yet to go before he retires....
I stay very busy....I'm an old domestic by heart so I clean, do laundry, bake %26amp; cook from scratch, do inside projects like paint woodwork, cabinets, walls.....do flower gardening out on our large deck %26amp; the small patch of yard in front of our detached condo (cottage).
We have one bossy indoor tuxedo cat %26amp; a black %26amp; white papillon dog that I care for daily.
Besides, sometimes my PsA flares (a form of arthritis) and when that happens, being home is a godsend as it often attacks my ankles %26amp; my hands/wrists-plus my former job has left me with hip %26amp; shoulder bursitis, and aggravated the arthritis in my lower spine which can inhibit movement and can be quite painful.
I work full time, but sometimes I think I would just love the luxury of staying home. I think at first I would keep very busy cleaning, volunteering, etc... but after a few weeks I would probably lose motivation and begin to put things off thinking I can do that anytime.... So eventually I would be bored. But I envy you.
i stay at home but i have 3 kids. i clean, garden, cook and go to gym every day. i am busy but quite bored - i am actually a career woman. so i do not want to get just any job for the sake of going to work, i want smth decent and powerful but cos i have been stay at home loser woman and lost my time this ain't gonna happen. well, at least i got my university education so i do not feel like a complete loser. and gym keeps my bu''tt firm and perky which makes my husband to want to provide for me
I volunteer at one of our large nursing homes every so often. I don't do it for the money but I do it because it makes me feel good. I'll be taking my state exam for CNA on Monday and my hope is to actually work there as a CNA. The residents I come in contact with are wonderful, and they would like for me to be there on a full-time basis. Other than that, my husband's got a job as an EMT (absolutely LOVES it), and wants to challenge the board as a Paramedic. He was already trained as a Paramedic in the National Guard and he doesn't want to go to school and relearn it if he was trained less than a year ago.
For right now, my main focus is to study for my state exam, and taking care of the kids. I just so happen to be on a break right now. I also do chores around the house, and so on. I'm actually pretty busy altogether..I never get bored :)
I do, and I am very busy. I take 9 - 12 credit hours every semester, plus do all the housework and cooking, plus take care of our 2 kids (home in the summer, volunteer at the school during the year), and take care of our 2 dogs and 2 cats. Plus I volunteer at an animal rescue.
Working my own money gives me a high so I work part-time and balance three kids and online school. I still clean and make dinner for my family, take them to after school stuff, help with homework etc. This makes me happy.
Enjoy your freedom before the kids come, get out and do more-make yourself happy.
My husband does work and I stay at home too. I have a laptop so that keeps me busy and I am going to school in 2 weeks for nursing degree. Maybe you can join a book club or volunteer for boy's and girl's club. I also help my husband with his business too.
I am overly busy. We both are. With three kids and I homeschool, and being a neat freak I am always going, going, going. I love it though. How lucky are we to be taken care of?!?
No boredom here. I come up with zillions of little plans and ideas that are ever changing and keeping me interested.
I did that for a little while - my fist husband didn't want me to work - but I really missed socializing - I spent my whole time looking for jobs and couldn't wait to get out. I can only cook and clean so much.
yep my hubby's a otr driver,so I stay home,we have 3 kids,and I love it.Find your self a hobby or volunteer in your community,
Well, I have children so I don't get bored but I do get resentful. He gets to leave, have a break and I have to be at home.
I take care of the kids, clean and cook. I do get bored and try to bust out of the joint on weekends.
I am a stay at home wife/mother. I do get bored at times but I also take college classes online and I do get out with my friends at least once a week.
yes, please tell me so I can get my husband a job there and we can afford for me to stay home, too.
I have a lot of female friends who are stay at home wives, really good friends we are.
If you don't have kids or a very severe illness, why is he keeping you at home?
When you were a teenager, did you want to eventually get married?
Did you actually get married?When you were a teenager, did you want to eventually get married?
No. I have never wanted to be married. I never did get married either. It seems to me that after most people get married, they seem to neglect each other. So I just never saw the point of getting married especially since I never wanted kids, although I do love kids. At age 47, I don't think I'm ever likely to change my mind.When you were a teenager, did you want to eventually get married?
I'm a teenager and I don't want to get married. Plenty of time for thinking about that later; for now I want to enjoy my independence.
yes, i do want to get married eventually
i am a teenager and i do plan to get married eventually
noo
Nope, I never did.lotion cream
No. I have never wanted to be married. I never did get married either. It seems to me that after most people get married, they seem to neglect each other. So I just never saw the point of getting married especially since I never wanted kids, although I do love kids. At age 47, I don't think I'm ever likely to change my mind.When you were a teenager, did you want to eventually get married?
I'm a teenager and I don't want to get married. Plenty of time for thinking about that later; for now I want to enjoy my independence.
yes, i do want to get married eventually
i am a teenager and i do plan to get married eventually
noo
Nope, I never did.
Has anyone ever been married to an addict that actually got better?
My husband has progressively turned into an addict. He wasn't always this way but it runs in his family big time. His mother died very young from cirrhosis along with other relatives. He spent the summer in rehab and now he is worse than ever. He always uses the excuse that relapse is a part of recovery, but to me that should be every now and then not every week! I just don't see him getting better until I leave and he hits his rock bottom.Has anyone ever been married to an addict that actually got better?
Every addict gets clean and stays clean when their ready, some may have all the best of intentions only to find that they relapse, and yes it is true that relapse is a part of recovery, to a certain degree, not weekly. I can't stress to you enough how important na or aa can be to someone who really wants to get clean and stay clean, rehab is just fine for a short period of time, having someone watching over you and guiding you is great, but rehab isn't a life long program, but na is. Wanting recovery is one thing, but doing it is another. And yes the odds are stacked up against him, but these odds are no different or worse them others who have family history's of addiction, and many addicts from these backgrounds have succeeded in being clean and staying clean. You can either choose to stay with him and hope that one day he cleans up his act, and who knows when that will be, it can be tomarow or 10 years down the road? Or you also have the option to leave, it's up to you, and I do hope that you are taking the steps to ensure that your quality of life isn't put in jeopordy from his actions as a addict? Take care of you!!Has anyone ever been married to an addict that actually got better?
Divorce him, you don't need to be married to a guy who is addicted to pills and drugs! DIVORCE!
Yes, some do. But it takes will power and a HIGHER POWER.
Oh gosh NO! Leave him! Don't let him drag you down.
Quiet frankly that may be the only way he will consider getting help . If he sees that you are not going to put up with it any more and you leave . Even then it is not guaranteed . He has to truly want help before he gets it . Right now by him doing this every week he is most likely just trying to pacify you .
My first husband was an alcoholic ( still is ) and my second husband was a drug addict ( still is only worse ) . I begged , pleaded , threatened what ever I could to get them both to get some help and they didn't so I packed up and left .
You can not help those that can not help themselves .
Good luck .
That is so lame, if he wanted to get over this addiction he would try harder. Tell him its you or his habit!
My husband married me and I do not touch hard alcohol. He is not a holier than thou person. I have been clean of drugs for 30 years. I do not have a need to touch them. I do have a couple glasses of wine with my best female friends. We are married ladies and look after each other. Our husbands might have a couple beers and one of us will do the driving. I have given my BFF's husbands or boyfriends a ride if i didn't drink that night. They get home safe. My husband picked up one of my girlfriends because I asked him to. She is a good friend of 20 years! He was being a gentleman. Her husband was grateful and wanted to pay him! My hubby didn't want money at all.
What is he addicted to?
Don't stay. Most drug addicts don't quit. Their life and their love is the drug. It comes first in their life. Just because he wants to live a crappy life doesn't mean you have to.
I was married to an addict. He smoked pot, snorted coke, and who knows what else. He would honestly try to get better - and several times would remain clean for a time. He always had an exuse for his relapses. Plus - addictive personalities are just that - when they get rid of one addiction, oftentimes another takes over. When he gave up drugs he drank more, or over ate. We are now divorced, but he says he is clean. His current addiction is religion - and not in a good way. He has essentially joined a cult.
That being said - one of my friends was married to an alcoholic. They separated and he hit rock bottom. That was the catalyst he needed. He has now been clean and sober for 10 years.
I guess the moral is - it can happen, it's just very rare.
Yes my husband was an addict. I gave him a choice, either he cleaned up or he moved back to his mothers until he was clean. I spent 3 yrs of hell cuz of it. But when I finally told him that he realized that he was an addict and decided for himself to clean up. And btw, relapse is not a part of recovery... That's what you should avoid...
Not until their ready to get better!! They have to want it!
My husband is a marriage counselor, and he has seen couples successfully overcome all kinds of addictions, from drugs to porn. It's hard though, and it takes time.
For me personally, I don't condone divorce but I would in the case of the three A's--adultery, abuse, ADDICTION.
I married my husband almost 5 years ago and I didn't know he was an alcoholic right away. It escalated until he beat me up one night and I threw his butt in jail. When he came out I told him I would only drop the charges and let him home if he stopped drinking. At this point he wanted to stop drinking anyway so he did. That was 6 months ago and he is the man I fell in love with all over again. So if your spouse really wants to quit he can. He does need to hit the bottom first. We were seperated for 6 weeks while he cleaned up.
He is not going to get better while you are around.. if he is really an alcoholic. You need to get out but try to be firm and let him know that you love him, but you can not let his addiction destroy two lives. it is messy with this kind of situation. good luck.
He can recover, but he's the one that really has to want to. No amount of nagging will help him. As for what you have to do is support him all you can stand to and if you can't take it anymore then no one will blame you if you leave him. It's not easy to put up with an addict.
You haven't stated what he is addicted to. So this may not be helpful. But I was the drunk, and my husband the one who stuck by me hoping it would end. The book Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey saved my life, and my marriage. I had tried rehab twice, and AA numerous times, and neither worked for me. I came across this book, and was initially put off by its' AA bashing. But the principles in it worked(and can be applied to any addiction), and put a stop to my addiction immediately. There is a section in the back for the family, I suggest you read this part. And the rest too, cause it will help you understand the nature of any addiction. You husband won't stop unless he really wants to. But if he even says he would like to stop, this book can work for him. Relapse is not a part of recovery. It is an excuse addicts use to continue use of their favorite substance. All programs like rehab and AA and NA give you a stack of excuses to set up in your mind as well, which is why lots of people get worse after rehab, and in these programs. Like ';if you don't call your sponsor, you might use'; ';if you don't pray every day, you might use';. Endless ifs. Rational Recovery removes all those ridiculous excuses, and provides you with a method for immediate cure. Abstinence. Permanently. It is possible, and it is awesome. Just go to amazon.com, and look up that book, and read the reviews. I'm not the only one who has had good experience with it. There are certainly some bad ones, usually from people wrapped up in AA. Please, give it a shot. And if that doesn't work, you might just have to leave, or keep putting up with it and be miserable. Good luck!
I was married to a nice man who happened to be an alcoholic.
And after 7 years of trying to make things work, I got so ill I had to be hospitalized.
So...I had to choose: a divorce and my health..or an unhappy marriage.
I chose myself. And am happy I did!
Bottom line: Unless he WANTS to aknowledge his problem and WANTS to seek help and DO something about it, you can do nothing.
Every addict gets clean and stays clean when their ready, some may have all the best of intentions only to find that they relapse, and yes it is true that relapse is a part of recovery, to a certain degree, not weekly. I can't stress to you enough how important na or aa can be to someone who really wants to get clean and stay clean, rehab is just fine for a short period of time, having someone watching over you and guiding you is great, but rehab isn't a life long program, but na is. Wanting recovery is one thing, but doing it is another. And yes the odds are stacked up against him, but these odds are no different or worse them others who have family history's of addiction, and many addicts from these backgrounds have succeeded in being clean and staying clean. You can either choose to stay with him and hope that one day he cleans up his act, and who knows when that will be, it can be tomarow or 10 years down the road? Or you also have the option to leave, it's up to you, and I do hope that you are taking the steps to ensure that your quality of life isn't put in jeopordy from his actions as a addict? Take care of you!!Has anyone ever been married to an addict that actually got better?
Divorce him, you don't need to be married to a guy who is addicted to pills and drugs! DIVORCE!
Yes, some do. But it takes will power and a HIGHER POWER.
Oh gosh NO! Leave him! Don't let him drag you down.
Quiet frankly that may be the only way he will consider getting help . If he sees that you are not going to put up with it any more and you leave . Even then it is not guaranteed . He has to truly want help before he gets it . Right now by him doing this every week he is most likely just trying to pacify you .
My first husband was an alcoholic ( still is ) and my second husband was a drug addict ( still is only worse ) . I begged , pleaded , threatened what ever I could to get them both to get some help and they didn't so I packed up and left .
You can not help those that can not help themselves .
Good luck .
That is so lame, if he wanted to get over this addiction he would try harder. Tell him its you or his habit!
My husband married me and I do not touch hard alcohol. He is not a holier than thou person. I have been clean of drugs for 30 years. I do not have a need to touch them. I do have a couple glasses of wine with my best female friends. We are married ladies and look after each other. Our husbands might have a couple beers and one of us will do the driving. I have given my BFF's husbands or boyfriends a ride if i didn't drink that night. They get home safe. My husband picked up one of my girlfriends because I asked him to. She is a good friend of 20 years! He was being a gentleman. Her husband was grateful and wanted to pay him! My hubby didn't want money at all.
What is he addicted to?
Don't stay. Most drug addicts don't quit. Their life and their love is the drug. It comes first in their life. Just because he wants to live a crappy life doesn't mean you have to.
I was married to an addict. He smoked pot, snorted coke, and who knows what else. He would honestly try to get better - and several times would remain clean for a time. He always had an exuse for his relapses. Plus - addictive personalities are just that - when they get rid of one addiction, oftentimes another takes over. When he gave up drugs he drank more, or over ate. We are now divorced, but he says he is clean. His current addiction is religion - and not in a good way. He has essentially joined a cult.
That being said - one of my friends was married to an alcoholic. They separated and he hit rock bottom. That was the catalyst he needed. He has now been clean and sober for 10 years.
I guess the moral is - it can happen, it's just very rare.
Yes my husband was an addict. I gave him a choice, either he cleaned up or he moved back to his mothers until he was clean. I spent 3 yrs of hell cuz of it. But when I finally told him that he realized that he was an addict and decided for himself to clean up. And btw, relapse is not a part of recovery... That's what you should avoid...
Not until their ready to get better!! They have to want it!
My husband is a marriage counselor, and he has seen couples successfully overcome all kinds of addictions, from drugs to porn. It's hard though, and it takes time.
For me personally, I don't condone divorce but I would in the case of the three A's--adultery, abuse, ADDICTION.
I married my husband almost 5 years ago and I didn't know he was an alcoholic right away. It escalated until he beat me up one night and I threw his butt in jail. When he came out I told him I would only drop the charges and let him home if he stopped drinking. At this point he wanted to stop drinking anyway so he did. That was 6 months ago and he is the man I fell in love with all over again. So if your spouse really wants to quit he can. He does need to hit the bottom first. We were seperated for 6 weeks while he cleaned up.
He is not going to get better while you are around.. if he is really an alcoholic. You need to get out but try to be firm and let him know that you love him, but you can not let his addiction destroy two lives. it is messy with this kind of situation. good luck.
He can recover, but he's the one that really has to want to. No amount of nagging will help him. As for what you have to do is support him all you can stand to and if you can't take it anymore then no one will blame you if you leave him. It's not easy to put up with an addict.
You haven't stated what he is addicted to. So this may not be helpful. But I was the drunk, and my husband the one who stuck by me hoping it would end. The book Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey saved my life, and my marriage. I had tried rehab twice, and AA numerous times, and neither worked for me. I came across this book, and was initially put off by its' AA bashing. But the principles in it worked(and can be applied to any addiction), and put a stop to my addiction immediately. There is a section in the back for the family, I suggest you read this part. And the rest too, cause it will help you understand the nature of any addiction. You husband won't stop unless he really wants to. But if he even says he would like to stop, this book can work for him. Relapse is not a part of recovery. It is an excuse addicts use to continue use of their favorite substance. All programs like rehab and AA and NA give you a stack of excuses to set up in your mind as well, which is why lots of people get worse after rehab, and in these programs. Like ';if you don't call your sponsor, you might use'; ';if you don't pray every day, you might use';. Endless ifs. Rational Recovery removes all those ridiculous excuses, and provides you with a method for immediate cure. Abstinence. Permanently. It is possible, and it is awesome. Just go to amazon.com, and look up that book, and read the reviews. I'm not the only one who has had good experience with it. There are certainly some bad ones, usually from people wrapped up in AA. Please, give it a shot. And if that doesn't work, you might just have to leave, or keep putting up with it and be miserable. Good luck!
I was married to a nice man who happened to be an alcoholic.
And after 7 years of trying to make things work, I got so ill I had to be hospitalized.
So...I had to choose: a divorce and my health..or an unhappy marriage.
I chose myself. And am happy I did!
Bottom line: Unless he WANTS to aknowledge his problem and WANTS to seek help and DO something about it, you can do nothing.
Why did some of my friends stop calling after I got married and had a baby?
I guess they think I'm a wet blanket or something, I plan on asking them but I thought I'd ask you all first. Did they stop hanging out with me to give me time with my family or are they too busy for me?Why did some of my friends stop calling after I got married and had a baby?
Maybe they didn't want to bother you. Being a parent is a very demanding job and yes, they may have decided you should have more time with family. Also, they probably think that it's harder for you to go out because you have to find a baby sitter....if none of them have children, maybe they feel it'll be harder to relate to you and what you're going through, so they haven't called to discuss it...Why did some of my friends stop calling after I got married and had a baby?
Maybe you are not as flexible as you used to be? If they are spontaneous, they may have called you once, twice, three times wanting to hang out with you - but if you weren't available, it became too difficult for them to schedule time with you.
Or maybe they feel that they don't have as much in common with you anymore; you may not even notice this, but your life probably very much revolves around your child, and you probably talk a lot about the baby - which is not the most interesting topic of conversation for people who don't have kids.
Also, just in general, once you get married, your priority shifts from your friends to your family; it's natural to spend less time with your friends - especially if they're still single. It's a different lifestyle. If you want to hang out with your friends, maybe you will have to initiate contact and suggest things to do together. Best idea, when you're a family, is to make friends with other families.
You may have noticed that a marriage and a baby DO take a bit of one's time.
They're probably assuming you're too busy, or too entranced with your new baby, which is natural and a common thing.
It's possible some of them think that you no longer have much in common. If so, that's a shame.
So, the thing to do is to call each one, and say how you've missed her, and arrange to get together.
You might also consider having them over (together or individually), to hang out with you AND the baby. There's no reason to have to segregate the people in your life from each other.
Hello %26amp; congratulations on your marriage %26amp; new baby! I think the best thing to do is just ask your friends. I think speculating about it doesn't really get you the answers %26amp; get you back to socializing with your friends. However, if I were to guess I would say that perhaps they want to respect boundaries by giving you more time with your husband %26amp; new baby. Now that you're married %26amp; have a child maybe they feel that they can't just pop over to see you because you probably have your hands full %26amp; you're busy with your day-to-day life. Also, if you %26amp; your friends were social at bars/clubs they might think that you don't want to go to those types of places now because you're married. If your friends are single %26amp; they go out clubbing or to pubs that might be why. And, there might be some kind of jealousy working too: Are your friends single? Do they want to be? Do these friends want children? Maybe you have what they want: child, husband %26amp; family. Who knows, it could be anything. All that being said, there are so many reasons that they could be a bit distant %26amp; I think the best way to find out is to come out and ask.
';sweetie'; when you get married much less have a child all your time is devoted to your family and you should not hang out all the time with old friends. maybe they could be jealous of your new lifestyle and honestly you dont need to be hanging around single friends all the time and you have a mate. in most cases that could cause problems in your marriage. iam not saying just neglect your freinds and be mean and think your all that now that your married, but after a while you husband might get tired of that and find that a interference with your marriage.
I doubt any of your friends have decided that you're a bore now and they don't want to hang out with you, and unless your friends are very shallow, they aren't jealous.
People just get busy in their own lives, and when your lives are really different, you have to make an extra effort to keep in touch. In planning your wedding and going through the early stages of your marriage, you had to put nearly all (or ALL) of your time and energy into your husband instead of your friends. Now that you have a child, even more of your energy is taken up at home. BUT it's also incredibly important for you to spend time with your single girl friends, now more than ever! They'll keep you feeling refreshed and energized and socialized! (It can get really lonely staying home with a baby!) Don't expect to go out to the club every weekend with a gang of halter-topped hotties, but do make an effort to stay connected to two or three of your best gal pals. Call them up and make plans. Maybe arrange a ';ladies' night'; when you can catch up with them and your hubby can spend some bonding time with the little one. Try to make it a regular thing -- twice a month or something like that. I'm sure your single friends are missing you and will be delighted to hear from you!
Good luck!
I would suggest that when you do get together that you share, but don't share too much. If your friend is single, they want to hear about what's new with you, but don't want to hear you go on and on about your new life. Not all single people are jealous of married people with kids. I would talk about the things that you spoke of before you got married and had a baby.
I've been that guy who's stopped calling, but it was only after repeated attempts to hang out with my friends. It got to the point where I could predict the answer before I even called. I understood the baby was more than time consuming, so I basically left it up to my friends with kids to contact me when they could go out. This proved to be a bad idea, because basically all of them that I stopped calling, they don't ever call me. I've never been ';too busy'; to hang out with my married/parent friends, but that's just me.
A word of advice; keeping friends is a two way street. You have a phone as well. Make it known when you have a sitter and a free weekend, I'm sure your friends will be available.
They probably think that you're too busy for them, and they probably know how taxing a baby can be.
Why don't you take the plunge and call them?
They'll get the hint after you call some of them a couple of times and mention that you've got a baby-sitter or something like that.
They're probably waiting for you to say that you aren't busy.
1) They probably figure you are busy with your little one
2) You now have less in common with them, having a baby takes up alot of time and they don't have the same experiences. You want to talk about feeding and burping and sleeping and diapers and they are just lost and have no input or interest.
3) Everyone changes as they get older and move different directions. My best friend in HS and College and Scouts I hardly speak to, only e-mail now, we are just different people
If they are single and you are married, you no longer have anything in common. Their priorties are going to be very different then yours. Surely, you'll get the occasional phone call asking how your doing, but you can just consider yourself right out of that social circle.
Dont be discouraged.. the same thing happens with guys.
This didn't happen to me when I got married, but after I had a baby it did. Do your friends have children?, if yes are they around the same age?
If your friends don't have children, they may not call because they no longer relate to you in the same way. If they do have children that are a different age they may understand that it is difficult to know when to call. They also may understand that children at different ages have different kinds of activities, ones that you and your family are not ready for yet.
My friends dropped off the face of the earth when I had my baby. I call them, and I arrange days out. I asked my friends point blank why they didn't call anymore. I got a few different responses, but the overall response was....we didn't want to disturb you.
Another thing is, is babies are distracting. It's tough to hang out with someone and their baby if you don't have one. You never really get their undivided attention.
So let your friends know you miss them, and you still want to hang out, and now NEED to hang out. Don't be angry with them, just let them know that it hurts that they don't call you.
I arrange movie theatre, and dinners out so I can hang with my friends.
Good Luck!
sometimes it just comes down to you and your friends being in different areas of you lives. Maybe they don'tt feel like that have that much in common to talk to you about? Mysuggestionn would be to not outright ask them as to why they have not called but for you to call and suggest getting together because you miss them
I had the same problem. I chalk most of it up to jealousy and being at different places in your lives that make it difficult to relate. After some of my friends started getting married and having kids, they suddenly wanted to talk again. I think it was painful for them to see that I had what they wanted.
well...you are now married and with a kid....so..I would ask you to
call your friends...only once a month or every other month...and invite them out to your house ..or to dinner etc....but do not expect them behaving the same ..ok...for they single and you are married...that just
the way things are..ok
Maybe they are waiting for you to call them with a new husband and a baby they might know you are busy and are waiting for an invitation. Why not just call and invite them over and let them know you still want them to be in your life.
A new marriage and new baby can be over whelming. Call them and make a ';girl date'; Have them over for some snack and chit chat so you can reconnect. As a new mother you are going to need some adult conversation...Elmo and Barney will wear you out!
it might be the contrary actually...when my friend got married and had a kid, it seems like she was too busy for us...So we thought, once she has time SHE will come to us. And it happens she was blaming us and saying we abandoned her. Go figure!
Maybe they thought you could be too busy with a baby. Call them and invite them somewhere to show them your not too busy for them. Maybe they thought you wanted time with your new baby. I doubt they are too busy for you.
I'm hoping they just wanted to give the both of you a little space. I say that because when I got married and when I had all four of my children my friends were right there with us each an every time.
I'm kind of going through this myself..what I've found is: you're in a different place in your life and your friends can't relate. It's a shame they don't make an effort but I feel your pain...hang in there!!
the single life and the married life (with kids) are fundementally diferent. That's why usually people get a whole new cast of friends who are married once they get married.
It could be because you no longer have any thing in common or they weren't your real friends to start with.
the prolly dont want to bother u becuz u have too much on your plate takin care of a baby n all y dont u just clal them and ask them to hang out and show em that u have time for them
well you are married with a baby!!! and they are not... either they are just jealous,,, or they think you already have a lot going on and might not have time.. either one of those two.. you know your friends better than anyone here
Maybe they didn't want to bother you. Being a parent is a very demanding job and yes, they may have decided you should have more time with family. Also, they probably think that it's harder for you to go out because you have to find a baby sitter....if none of them have children, maybe they feel it'll be harder to relate to you and what you're going through, so they haven't called to discuss it...Why did some of my friends stop calling after I got married and had a baby?
Maybe you are not as flexible as you used to be? If they are spontaneous, they may have called you once, twice, three times wanting to hang out with you - but if you weren't available, it became too difficult for them to schedule time with you.
Or maybe they feel that they don't have as much in common with you anymore; you may not even notice this, but your life probably very much revolves around your child, and you probably talk a lot about the baby - which is not the most interesting topic of conversation for people who don't have kids.
Also, just in general, once you get married, your priority shifts from your friends to your family; it's natural to spend less time with your friends - especially if they're still single. It's a different lifestyle. If you want to hang out with your friends, maybe you will have to initiate contact and suggest things to do together. Best idea, when you're a family, is to make friends with other families.
You may have noticed that a marriage and a baby DO take a bit of one's time.
They're probably assuming you're too busy, or too entranced with your new baby, which is natural and a common thing.
It's possible some of them think that you no longer have much in common. If so, that's a shame.
So, the thing to do is to call each one, and say how you've missed her, and arrange to get together.
You might also consider having them over (together or individually), to hang out with you AND the baby. There's no reason to have to segregate the people in your life from each other.
Hello %26amp; congratulations on your marriage %26amp; new baby! I think the best thing to do is just ask your friends. I think speculating about it doesn't really get you the answers %26amp; get you back to socializing with your friends. However, if I were to guess I would say that perhaps they want to respect boundaries by giving you more time with your husband %26amp; new baby. Now that you're married %26amp; have a child maybe they feel that they can't just pop over to see you because you probably have your hands full %26amp; you're busy with your day-to-day life. Also, if you %26amp; your friends were social at bars/clubs they might think that you don't want to go to those types of places now because you're married. If your friends are single %26amp; they go out clubbing or to pubs that might be why. And, there might be some kind of jealousy working too: Are your friends single? Do they want to be? Do these friends want children? Maybe you have what they want: child, husband %26amp; family. Who knows, it could be anything. All that being said, there are so many reasons that they could be a bit distant %26amp; I think the best way to find out is to come out and ask.
';sweetie'; when you get married much less have a child all your time is devoted to your family and you should not hang out all the time with old friends. maybe they could be jealous of your new lifestyle and honestly you dont need to be hanging around single friends all the time and you have a mate. in most cases that could cause problems in your marriage. iam not saying just neglect your freinds and be mean and think your all that now that your married, but after a while you husband might get tired of that and find that a interference with your marriage.
I doubt any of your friends have decided that you're a bore now and they don't want to hang out with you, and unless your friends are very shallow, they aren't jealous.
People just get busy in their own lives, and when your lives are really different, you have to make an extra effort to keep in touch. In planning your wedding and going through the early stages of your marriage, you had to put nearly all (or ALL) of your time and energy into your husband instead of your friends. Now that you have a child, even more of your energy is taken up at home. BUT it's also incredibly important for you to spend time with your single girl friends, now more than ever! They'll keep you feeling refreshed and energized and socialized! (It can get really lonely staying home with a baby!) Don't expect to go out to the club every weekend with a gang of halter-topped hotties, but do make an effort to stay connected to two or three of your best gal pals. Call them up and make plans. Maybe arrange a ';ladies' night'; when you can catch up with them and your hubby can spend some bonding time with the little one. Try to make it a regular thing -- twice a month or something like that. I'm sure your single friends are missing you and will be delighted to hear from you!
Good luck!
I would suggest that when you do get together that you share, but don't share too much. If your friend is single, they want to hear about what's new with you, but don't want to hear you go on and on about your new life. Not all single people are jealous of married people with kids. I would talk about the things that you spoke of before you got married and had a baby.
I've been that guy who's stopped calling, but it was only after repeated attempts to hang out with my friends. It got to the point where I could predict the answer before I even called. I understood the baby was more than time consuming, so I basically left it up to my friends with kids to contact me when they could go out. This proved to be a bad idea, because basically all of them that I stopped calling, they don't ever call me. I've never been ';too busy'; to hang out with my married/parent friends, but that's just me.
A word of advice; keeping friends is a two way street. You have a phone as well. Make it known when you have a sitter and a free weekend, I'm sure your friends will be available.
They probably think that you're too busy for them, and they probably know how taxing a baby can be.
Why don't you take the plunge and call them?
They'll get the hint after you call some of them a couple of times and mention that you've got a baby-sitter or something like that.
They're probably waiting for you to say that you aren't busy.
1) They probably figure you are busy with your little one
2) You now have less in common with them, having a baby takes up alot of time and they don't have the same experiences. You want to talk about feeding and burping and sleeping and diapers and they are just lost and have no input or interest.
3) Everyone changes as they get older and move different directions. My best friend in HS and College and Scouts I hardly speak to, only e-mail now, we are just different people
If they are single and you are married, you no longer have anything in common. Their priorties are going to be very different then yours. Surely, you'll get the occasional phone call asking how your doing, but you can just consider yourself right out of that social circle.
Dont be discouraged.. the same thing happens with guys.
This didn't happen to me when I got married, but after I had a baby it did. Do your friends have children?, if yes are they around the same age?
If your friends don't have children, they may not call because they no longer relate to you in the same way. If they do have children that are a different age they may understand that it is difficult to know when to call. They also may understand that children at different ages have different kinds of activities, ones that you and your family are not ready for yet.
My friends dropped off the face of the earth when I had my baby. I call them, and I arrange days out. I asked my friends point blank why they didn't call anymore. I got a few different responses, but the overall response was....we didn't want to disturb you.
Another thing is, is babies are distracting. It's tough to hang out with someone and their baby if you don't have one. You never really get their undivided attention.
So let your friends know you miss them, and you still want to hang out, and now NEED to hang out. Don't be angry with them, just let them know that it hurts that they don't call you.
I arrange movie theatre, and dinners out so I can hang with my friends.
Good Luck!
sometimes it just comes down to you and your friends being in different areas of you lives. Maybe they don'tt feel like that have that much in common to talk to you about? Mysuggestionn would be to not outright ask them as to why they have not called but for you to call and suggest getting together because you miss them
I had the same problem. I chalk most of it up to jealousy and being at different places in your lives that make it difficult to relate. After some of my friends started getting married and having kids, they suddenly wanted to talk again. I think it was painful for them to see that I had what they wanted.
well...you are now married and with a kid....so..I would ask you to
call your friends...only once a month or every other month...and invite them out to your house ..or to dinner etc....but do not expect them behaving the same ..ok...for they single and you are married...that just
the way things are..ok
Maybe they are waiting for you to call them with a new husband and a baby they might know you are busy and are waiting for an invitation. Why not just call and invite them over and let them know you still want them to be in your life.
A new marriage and new baby can be over whelming. Call them and make a ';girl date'; Have them over for some snack and chit chat so you can reconnect. As a new mother you are going to need some adult conversation...Elmo and Barney will wear you out!
it might be the contrary actually...when my friend got married and had a kid, it seems like she was too busy for us...So we thought, once she has time SHE will come to us. And it happens she was blaming us and saying we abandoned her. Go figure!
Maybe they thought you could be too busy with a baby. Call them and invite them somewhere to show them your not too busy for them. Maybe they thought you wanted time with your new baby. I doubt they are too busy for you.
I'm hoping they just wanted to give the both of you a little space. I say that because when I got married and when I had all four of my children my friends were right there with us each an every time.
I'm kind of going through this myself..what I've found is: you're in a different place in your life and your friends can't relate. It's a shame they don't make an effort but I feel your pain...hang in there!!
the single life and the married life (with kids) are fundementally diferent. That's why usually people get a whole new cast of friends who are married once they get married.
It could be because you no longer have any thing in common or they weren't your real friends to start with.
the prolly dont want to bother u becuz u have too much on your plate takin care of a baby n all y dont u just clal them and ask them to hang out and show em that u have time for them
well you are married with a baby!!! and they are not... either they are just jealous,,, or they think you already have a lot going on and might not have time.. either one of those two.. you know your friends better than anyone here
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